I have so much hatred... what can I do to destroy it?
It all started on August 12, 2009. My life circumstances have gone totally downhill and I have stored so much hatred against two people, the ones responsible for all my disgrace until this very second I'm writing. I had a good job in Northern Virginia. Good pay, my own apartment, good friends, and an overall stability. Though my job was never the best environment, this date I mentioned above, changed my life and up to now it has been all generally bad. I had a question on a job I was doing and I went to my supervisor. He took the time to ask me a question to test my knowledge and I could not provide the right answer. His mood went bad. He told me he was shocked and began to scold me for past works, that I was taking long and from there, it just went really bad. I did not have a good evaluation even after taking my free time to study and read and get up to speed because his question went more difficult and more difficult. In September, he gave me a job but never told what was the deadline, so I tried to do it the best I could, and it was my very first time doing such a job. The following day he came to me to ask me if I was finished, but I was just on my 20%. So I took the job home and tried to rush and kept working until 4:30am. I did not sleep much, and I delivered the job next day. Everything seemed ok. The next week one of my coworkers found a mistake and told him and he scolded me inside his office with the door shut criticizing my job. Next day he gave me a "technical" evaluation and he told almost two hours just to mention how bad I was doing. Then, a couple of weeks later, because I was going to have a new supervisor because this SOB went to another branch, he took my new supervisor for the final evaluation. He denigrated me in front of the other, passing the bad perception to him because though my personal relationship with the new supervisor was somehow better, he still gave me a bad evaluation later. I quickly noticed when discussing with him that he was simply afraid to give me a good evaluation because it would seem weird and could cause a bad perception on his boss in terms of inconsistency. But the thing that worsened the situation was this f@#$ SOB co-worker, he mocked me every way he could, in Facebook, in Evite Invitations, in e-mails, I was a fool to not have reported him I know, but this guy I am sure was the masterpiece author of all my disgraces there. He mocked a handicapped co-worker as well and was extremely troublesome with many people around- but he had 15 years of experience and so he delivered good jobs in short time, which is basically what matters to most companies. He went to some of my friends to talk about me and how bad I was doing, but they knew better and noticed he was a prick. Some of them ended infuriated with him because of personal problems with him (which I had nothing to do with). He even slammed a door to one of the female workers in the office. So, having made very good friends and liking the area (I still talk to them today), I made the sad decision to give up my independence and stability and had to resign, had to leave the area and now I am in Florida. Before leaving, the supervisor gave me fair evaluation and even a portrait. Weird, right? Here I am- living my parents, passing through very tough moments, have no money, no independence, bored, have applied to hundreds of jobs and it is now, almost one year later, that I have been contacted for interviews. It is now that I am feeling some sort of comfort but my first interview did not work, I believe I did well but they simply chose someone better; and now I am waiting for another interview, it was going to be yesterday but they had to postpone it to sometime in the future they don't still know. They said they were going to call me to set the new time, but I guess I have to wait. Nevertheless, there is a big situation in my family which is going to burst pretty soon and I will have to presence it. My friends there in Virginia keep having a lot of success (and I am happy with them!) while here I am, stuck, stagnant, fu@#$% depending on my parents like a fu@#$% kid, 28 years old I am supposed to have a home, independence, I have tried lots of jobs in my field and unrelated to my field but the freakin' economy is bad and I have no freakin' clue when I will have a job, and all of this is thanks to those two f@#$% SOB that I hate with all my heart! I am in the point I am cursing them everyday, my hatred against them is so, so strong, they have made my life miserable, I remember by good times as an independent man and thanks to with those f@#$%%'s I am here waiting for a big problem to burst in my family and having to be here when it happens (I have nothing to do with it), not be able to travel around because I have no money. I was raised a Christian and I never hated anyone, of course there have been incidents with some people, but these two are the ones that h
Religion & Spirituality - 5 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Anger Management/Counseling
2 :
You will have to stop acting like a kid if you want to be not treated like one. I read this and i thought it was like a 15 year old or something
3 :
Go to your knees and pray that the Holy Spirit will calm your mind and give you peace. Spend more time studying the word of God in the Holy Bible and try to be obedient to God's will in all that you do. There will be no more room in your heart for hate.
4 :
Counseling... or marijuana
5 :
Well calm down. I know that you have hate in your heart but you -have- to let it go and you-have- to forgive them. You need to ask God for the strength to move on with your life and to forget about your past. It's done and over with, there is nothing you can do. You have to forgive those who wrong you if you want to be forgiven by God. So take it for what it is and let it go. Ask God to help you love these people. Pray for them everyday that they learn how to treat people better. Life is hard for a lot of people out there now, not just you. So be grateful that you even have a family to turn to in a time of need, and you aren't homeless! Have faith that God will take care of you and He will. Read the New Testament with an open heart. Be accepting of Jesus Christ and let go of all your anger and hate. Talk with God in prayer and allow Him to heal you.
Read more other entries :
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Thursday, June 7, 2012
I'm hurting [please help!!!]?
I'm hurting [please help!!!]?
Alright, here's the deal: I've been in this on-and-off again relationship for the past year and a half with this chick. Can honestly say I love her to death. I've overlooked the lies, deceit, and so forth on a few occasions and still stuck by her side to make it work. She has a daughter, who is now 3, that looks up to me and calls me daddy (even though I'm not the biological father) ... We've lived together, I'd get kicked out, invited back, I'd leave, come back. It was basically dysfunctional. (But I kept finding my way back to her in the name of "LOVE"). & even at times of our split, I still played the background and served as a safety net- and still took care of this little girl/her daughter, with no questions asked...) So, 3 weeks ago, I end my lease early to move into a spot with her.. Last week? We get into an argument, and for once, I'm the one to blame-- and I swear the argument wasn't that major.. So --- of course she still has my belongings, so we set up a date for me to get my stuff.. As I'm getting my stuff, I guess she called her cousin from W. Virginia to come/spend the night. Her cousin brought her bf and I guess a guy for my ex-girl.... They end up going to W. Virginia, and apparently these 2 (my ex and this new guy) formed a "48 hour" love thing- unbeknown to me. So, while I'm contacting my gf trying to make it work- they come back from W. Virginia and he's in her house- spending the night .. I ask if I can come over, if we can talk, have dinner and discuss our relationship. She tells me, no, her cousin is over, and not to come by because she's going back to W. Virginia later ... she just needs time by herself to think things through... Turns out, she lied to me.. Her "cousin" wasn't there at all, it was actually this new guy her cousin hooked her up with. So, last night, when I found out I couldn't sleep, it hurts me, how she could throw our family away over some new guy she just met.. She sends me a message basically saying she misses me, and we'll talk about our relationship when she gets back... Then she goes on her facebook, and updates her status saying "She met a new guy and she's feeling him a lot".. & of course we have mutual friends, so this is how I found out.. Oh yeah, forgot to mention... She told me she's planning on moving to W. Virginia soon (We live in Maryland). I told her not to contact me ever again - even in regards to the little girl.. & it's strange because she left the little girl unattended with this man while she called me the other day from the store -- i asked where "my daughter" was, and she said with her counsin, in the house.. but they're about to leave out soon... --- All of this is too much to take in, and I'm hurting tremendously..
Singles & Dating - 1 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
WOW.!!! I must say we never know people as well as we think we do. She moved on very quickly after your fight and I have to tell ya buddy. This was only a indication that she would of done this sort of thing even if the fight never of happened. People do not stray that quick unless they were waiting for the opportunity for awhile. You finally saw the person she will always be. She did you a favor. You took care of her kid and became a step up to the plate dad and she threw all of that away for some guy and lack of common sense. yeah it hurts but now you get to move on, find a woman with no baggage or drama and look to start your own family. Eventually this woman's daughter will hate her once she is old enough to know any better but now you owe it to yourself to let it go and take this as a lesson learn. Do not take her back, all of those messages are crap and she's trying to hold onto you while trying out this new guy. If she come back then either he dumped her or she could not get anything form him. You deserve someone that will not use a fight as an excuse to run off and have sex with a stranger. I hope things work out for you.
Read more other entries :
Alright, here's the deal: I've been in this on-and-off again relationship for the past year and a half with this chick. Can honestly say I love her to death. I've overlooked the lies, deceit, and so forth on a few occasions and still stuck by her side to make it work. She has a daughter, who is now 3, that looks up to me and calls me daddy (even though I'm not the biological father) ... We've lived together, I'd get kicked out, invited back, I'd leave, come back. It was basically dysfunctional. (But I kept finding my way back to her in the name of "LOVE"). & even at times of our split, I still played the background and served as a safety net- and still took care of this little girl/her daughter, with no questions asked...) So, 3 weeks ago, I end my lease early to move into a spot with her.. Last week? We get into an argument, and for once, I'm the one to blame-- and I swear the argument wasn't that major.. So --- of course she still has my belongings, so we set up a date for me to get my stuff.. As I'm getting my stuff, I guess she called her cousin from W. Virginia to come/spend the night. Her cousin brought her bf and I guess a guy for my ex-girl.... They end up going to W. Virginia, and apparently these 2 (my ex and this new guy) formed a "48 hour" love thing- unbeknown to me. So, while I'm contacting my gf trying to make it work- they come back from W. Virginia and he's in her house- spending the night .. I ask if I can come over, if we can talk, have dinner and discuss our relationship. She tells me, no, her cousin is over, and not to come by because she's going back to W. Virginia later ... she just needs time by herself to think things through... Turns out, she lied to me.. Her "cousin" wasn't there at all, it was actually this new guy her cousin hooked her up with. So, last night, when I found out I couldn't sleep, it hurts me, how she could throw our family away over some new guy she just met.. She sends me a message basically saying she misses me, and we'll talk about our relationship when she gets back... Then she goes on her facebook, and updates her status saying "She met a new guy and she's feeling him a lot".. & of course we have mutual friends, so this is how I found out.. Oh yeah, forgot to mention... She told me she's planning on moving to W. Virginia soon (We live in Maryland). I told her not to contact me ever again - even in regards to the little girl.. & it's strange because she left the little girl unattended with this man while she called me the other day from the store -- i asked where "my daughter" was, and she said with her counsin, in the house.. but they're about to leave out soon... --- All of this is too much to take in, and I'm hurting tremendously..
Singles & Dating - 1 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
WOW.!!! I must say we never know people as well as we think we do. She moved on very quickly after your fight and I have to tell ya buddy. This was only a indication that she would of done this sort of thing even if the fight never of happened. People do not stray that quick unless they were waiting for the opportunity for awhile. You finally saw the person she will always be. She did you a favor. You took care of her kid and became a step up to the plate dad and she threw all of that away for some guy and lack of common sense. yeah it hurts but now you get to move on, find a woman with no baggage or drama and look to start your own family. Eventually this woman's daughter will hate her once she is old enough to know any better but now you owe it to yourself to let it go and take this as a lesson learn. Do not take her back, all of those messages are crap and she's trying to hold onto you while trying out this new guy. If she come back then either he dumped her or she could not get anything form him. You deserve someone that will not use a fight as an excuse to run off and have sex with a stranger. I hope things work out for you.
Read more other entries :
Friday, June 1, 2012
How do I discipline my 15 year old sister over the summer?
How do I discipline my 15 year old sister over the summer?
I myself am 24, and am contemplating having my 15 year old sister spend the summer with my family. She lives in Texas, and we are in Nebraska. She is a great student, she takes honors classes and play the clarinet in the marching band. Totally differnt at home though. Shes been quite unruly the past year and a half. Mainly boy troubles, and disrespecting/being rude my mom. It started with texting cleavage pictures to boys--which led to having her cell taken away, then instant messaging sexual messages on Facebook-- so she has lost her computer privleges at home, she carried on a relationship with a boy three years older than her in a program similar to JROTC, even after being told to stop. Most recently, my mom found out she and this boy had had sex. I wont go into all the details, but I have no problem answering questions about her situation. I want her to come to my house for the summer, not to escape her problems/punishment, but to let her see that she can still be 15. That even though she did let mom down, its not the end of the world. She can still be happy. I want her to go to church, and get involved with a youth group. I'd like her to have a summer job, and take on more responsibilities at home. I want her to learn to communicate, that even when you ahve made a mistake, you can talk about it. She could also play in one of the city's summer sports leagues. I'm stumped for discipline ideas though. She's 15, shes not perfect. I know she will disobey me. There will be a day she comes home late, or doesnt tell me shes going somewhere, or won't clean her room, etc. Just seems whatever discipline my mother uses does not get through. I want her to understand the things she has done are wrong, and that there will be a punishment for it. I just don;t know what. I do plan to discuss discipline/punishment with our mom, I just think we need new ideas! I'd like ot have her know what her punishments will be for certain behaviors... so that I am more enforcing rules and discipline from our mom, than trying to be her boss. I want to try to keep the sister role in this, not take over the mom role. Thanks!
Adolescent - 4 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
my moms Friend has a 20 yr, 16 yr, 10 yr, and a 4 yr and she took in her 14 yr niece on the count of the 14yr old's mom lost her home so they split up the kids anyways...the 14 yr old is the same way yet her aunt just wants to condemn her and not discipline her so if it were i ((in both your situations)) i would make her go to church sun morning and night sundays school and everything and youth group on Wednesday night because if shes around good christian kids shes gonna act better to try to fit in
2 :
Really you can't stop her. The more you try to stop her, the more cool stories she'll have to share to all the boys. She's reaching that age - and all you can do is remind her to continue with her regular routines and maybe share a few stories of your sexual life. A small warning about a few guys will go a long way. Other then that you must give her her space and trust her. She'll be peer pressures into sharing pictures and such; but that's how most girls that age are. You need to remind her of her woman power; and place your trust in her. Maybe continue reminding her you trust her so she will feel guilty in the acts. Sadly if you push to hard to get in the way; you'll make the situations worse.
3 :
Hey!! I'm in Nebraska!! Anyways! I think it's great you want to do this, being a big sister myself, I know what it's like to want to guide the little one. I say you take her out for her favorite food or ice cream and have a talk. Tell her that yeah, what she was doing was bad but you don't think she's a horrible person. Tell her that no matter what everyone is going to love her just the same. Also, give her a self esteem boost. The reason she's sending those pics is because she feels like the only way she will get a guy is by showing off. Same with sex. Take her to get her hair done and teach her how to be a lady. Tell her that playing hard to get is just as effective. I like the job idea. I got a job at 15 and I matured fast. It was great to be able to do what I wanted with my money. I'm sure she wants a car when she turns 16, so this is a great way to save up. Youth group and church are good too. This way she can make friends while she'd down there. As for punishment get her a tracfone. The prepaid phone will help with responsibility! When she gets her job she will be paying for it so I doubt she'll want to use it that much. And make sure you check the phone too. She did something bad and still deserves a punishment, so her privacy rights have been taken away. I would block facebook, myspace, skype, AIM, all of that kind of stuff on your computer. And make sure you are checking the history. Maybe put her in etiquette classes to teach her manners and how to respect her mom and herself. Remember, tell her you love her and that if she works hard at becoming a better person, life at home will become a lot easier. :)
4 :
Punishment isn't going to work anymore. She is fast becoming an adult .. she knows it. What you need to do it talk to her as an equal. She needs to realize that she should stop these things for herself not to avoid punishment. Here's an example ... When I was a teen there were many people offering me drugs. I thought (and still do) people that did drugs were stupid and wanted nothing to do with them. Had I wanted the drugs no amount of punishment would have stopped me from taking them. In your sister's case she has to avoid sex because she wants to. As for punishments... Cleaning her room? Try mocking her filth ... embarrassment is a very big motivator .. so if she doesn't clean it tell her you will post pictures of her room on facebook. When she is late or doesn't tell you where she went.... time to practice your acting skills. Make a big fuss when she comes home. "OMG! I thought you were dead or someone kidnapped you!" Crying as much as you can. Guilt .. also good motivation. Make her swear that she will never ever do that again. As for sex... hmmm... that one is going to be the hardest to manage. As I said no punishment will stop this. Playing devil's advocate you could approach the matter by telling her personal stories (make one up if you have to) about how you had problems because you had sex with someone.
Read more other entries :
I myself am 24, and am contemplating having my 15 year old sister spend the summer with my family. She lives in Texas, and we are in Nebraska. She is a great student, she takes honors classes and play the clarinet in the marching band. Totally differnt at home though. Shes been quite unruly the past year and a half. Mainly boy troubles, and disrespecting/being rude my mom. It started with texting cleavage pictures to boys--which led to having her cell taken away, then instant messaging sexual messages on Facebook-- so she has lost her computer privleges at home, she carried on a relationship with a boy three years older than her in a program similar to JROTC, even after being told to stop. Most recently, my mom found out she and this boy had had sex. I wont go into all the details, but I have no problem answering questions about her situation. I want her to come to my house for the summer, not to escape her problems/punishment, but to let her see that she can still be 15. That even though she did let mom down, its not the end of the world. She can still be happy. I want her to go to church, and get involved with a youth group. I'd like her to have a summer job, and take on more responsibilities at home. I want her to learn to communicate, that even when you ahve made a mistake, you can talk about it. She could also play in one of the city's summer sports leagues. I'm stumped for discipline ideas though. She's 15, shes not perfect. I know she will disobey me. There will be a day she comes home late, or doesnt tell me shes going somewhere, or won't clean her room, etc. Just seems whatever discipline my mother uses does not get through. I want her to understand the things she has done are wrong, and that there will be a punishment for it. I just don;t know what. I do plan to discuss discipline/punishment with our mom, I just think we need new ideas! I'd like ot have her know what her punishments will be for certain behaviors... so that I am more enforcing rules and discipline from our mom, than trying to be her boss. I want to try to keep the sister role in this, not take over the mom role. Thanks!
Adolescent - 4 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
my moms Friend has a 20 yr, 16 yr, 10 yr, and a 4 yr and she took in her 14 yr niece on the count of the 14yr old's mom lost her home so they split up the kids anyways...the 14 yr old is the same way yet her aunt just wants to condemn her and not discipline her so if it were i ((in both your situations)) i would make her go to church sun morning and night sundays school and everything and youth group on Wednesday night because if shes around good christian kids shes gonna act better to try to fit in
2 :
Really you can't stop her. The more you try to stop her, the more cool stories she'll have to share to all the boys. She's reaching that age - and all you can do is remind her to continue with her regular routines and maybe share a few stories of your sexual life. A small warning about a few guys will go a long way. Other then that you must give her her space and trust her. She'll be peer pressures into sharing pictures and such; but that's how most girls that age are. You need to remind her of her woman power; and place your trust in her. Maybe continue reminding her you trust her so she will feel guilty in the acts. Sadly if you push to hard to get in the way; you'll make the situations worse.
3 :
Hey!! I'm in Nebraska!! Anyways! I think it's great you want to do this, being a big sister myself, I know what it's like to want to guide the little one. I say you take her out for her favorite food or ice cream and have a talk. Tell her that yeah, what she was doing was bad but you don't think she's a horrible person. Tell her that no matter what everyone is going to love her just the same. Also, give her a self esteem boost. The reason she's sending those pics is because she feels like the only way she will get a guy is by showing off. Same with sex. Take her to get her hair done and teach her how to be a lady. Tell her that playing hard to get is just as effective. I like the job idea. I got a job at 15 and I matured fast. It was great to be able to do what I wanted with my money. I'm sure she wants a car when she turns 16, so this is a great way to save up. Youth group and church are good too. This way she can make friends while she'd down there. As for punishment get her a tracfone. The prepaid phone will help with responsibility! When she gets her job she will be paying for it so I doubt she'll want to use it that much. And make sure you check the phone too. She did something bad and still deserves a punishment, so her privacy rights have been taken away. I would block facebook, myspace, skype, AIM, all of that kind of stuff on your computer. And make sure you are checking the history. Maybe put her in etiquette classes to teach her manners and how to respect her mom and herself. Remember, tell her you love her and that if she works hard at becoming a better person, life at home will become a lot easier. :)
4 :
Punishment isn't going to work anymore. She is fast becoming an adult .. she knows it. What you need to do it talk to her as an equal. She needs to realize that she should stop these things for herself not to avoid punishment. Here's an example ... When I was a teen there were many people offering me drugs. I thought (and still do) people that did drugs were stupid and wanted nothing to do with them. Had I wanted the drugs no amount of punishment would have stopped me from taking them. In your sister's case she has to avoid sex because she wants to. As for punishments... Cleaning her room? Try mocking her filth ... embarrassment is a very big motivator .. so if she doesn't clean it tell her you will post pictures of her room on facebook. When she is late or doesn't tell you where she went.... time to practice your acting skills. Make a big fuss when she comes home. "OMG! I thought you were dead or someone kidnapped you!" Crying as much as you can. Guilt .. also good motivation. Make her swear that she will never ever do that again. As for sex... hmmm... that one is going to be the hardest to manage. As I said no punishment will stop this. Playing devil's advocate you could approach the matter by telling her personal stories (make one up if you have to) about how you had problems because you had sex with someone.
Read more other entries :
Monday, May 28, 2012
What to do with financial baggage from before marriage, during marriage?
What to do with financial baggage from before marriage, during marriage?
This is definitely something couples should talk about before marriage. (Skip to the end for the question if u don't like to read because this is a long story) I did not do this, now its the only arguments we have ever had in our entire relationship and its taking a toll on me!! No matter I would still have loved him and married him, but it still should be discussed prior too! Here's the story my loving caring perfect for me husband is amazing, but financially he is very irresponsible. I knew he had bills but he failed to fully inform me how bad he was in the hole, when I informed him on the bills I had prior to marriage. I take care of my own bills that i had prior to our marriage and so does he here is the biggest problem. He was in a 3 year relationship before he was with me. In this relationship he was living the marriage life-style without being married, sharing a bank account, credit cards, rent, car etc. etc. He racked up on debt with his x and failed to think hmm what if this doesn't work out its very easy to just walk away we aren't married! Anyway he took out a debt consolidation loan jointly with her to resolve their stupid financial mistakes. They were living beyond their means and it backfired. So of coarse they split and what happens... HELL! They now had to solve what was what! He basically took the bills with his name and she took the ones with hers ignoring the ones they had jointly. So when we start dating she gets angry of coarse because she wants him back and he makes it plainly obvious that he was going to choose me (they weren't together when we met but she was still fighting to get him back he is a really good guy just not financially lol) , so now she is a woman scorned(hell hath no fury). So he then joins the army while in the basic he sent her three checks to pay their debt consolidation loan. I of coarse advise against this reminding him of how hurt and angry she is!! No he didn't listen she took that money paid her rent and went on a vacation to the beach, she went out with a bang and still has him hanging by the neck with this loan or should i say hanging by the balls! He also has a closed (so far overdrawn they said hell no u cant keep this account open) suntrust account with her, that he jointly owned and still jointly owes money on! So when he gets out of basic ait then airborne we get married about a month later. As we are planning for our fairytale love future together we start the topic of bills, the drama with us to now begins...prior to this we had never had a serious argument besides the petty why didn't u call or call back stuff! I basically(during arguing) tell him he needs to take care of it because its going to affect us getting anything such as a house or car later and I feel like he kept a lot of this from me before when we discussed our bills prior to marriage and he left out a lot a whole lot! I don't know if he was embarrassed but I still feel it should have been discussed. So I tell him to call her and all of the bills they share and straighten things out. Results: Citifinancial will not divide the loan but because he explained him trying to pay but his x pocketing the money then being in training he was in a hard place, so they put him in good standing with the account and set him up with decent payments. Then he talked to his x and she said how much she could pay a month. With the suntrust he told her he would get back to her but when he tried she didn't answer its been 4 days since he talked to her and she has yet to answer so i went on her facebook its public so any1 can see (i love facebook) and her status read " i wonder if i don't respond for 2 days... will he get the point." this was written yesterday. So me knowing how an angry woman can be i don't believe she is going to pay without legal action. Here are my questions: - Is this a matter for small claims court? -Am I wrong for telling him I want to be in charge of paying all the bills, and I will come to him every time one of us gets paid and tell him what I will be paying, but I will be the one physically in charge of doing it? I think he feels emasculated by me saying I don't think he can handle the bills! -Was I wrong for opening a joint savings account for both of us to put money into ( he didn't know it was going to be joint he thought it was going to be for me but he put money in it also. then he open a checking with the same bank later, even though he said he wanted to do it he felt i should have at least let him know) -How does my husband file against her? (requesting her to pay half of the loan minus any bills or purchases that are proven to be his) -what would be the best evidence to bring to court? - what if she is ordered to pay at court but time goes by and she still hasn't paid? how long is she given to pay it? -do u think taking her to court as I have been suggesting for the past 2 months is a http://www.OnlineBusinessMall.com- website did not help whatsoever lol but thanks for trying http://carekorner.com same as other website no help but again thanks http://www.lifeplanz.com/ lol i don't need a job i need my questions answered
Personal Finance - 3 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Calling the creditors and asking them to split the loans between your husband and his ex isn't going to help - they aren't going to do it. Each of them is legally responsible for the entire amounts of any joint debts, and the creditors will get it from whoever they can get it from. And what would you expect from small claims court? You/he has no case there either. Yes this should have all been clear before you were married, but that doesn't help now. You'd be wise to keep your own finances separate from your husband's (NO joint accounts) until this is all paid off.
2 :
Hi Unfortunately most of the companies online that offer debt relief are scams.I can suggest you one of them that really works... no doubt. They helped me to save more than 30% ... If you are serious about that, Go to http://DebtHelper.info Hope that was helpful
3 :
I didnt want to read your long as hell question but saw ur confused about money. Hit up militaryonesource.com or call them. they have tons of resources and you talk to real people. its all free for military
Read more other entries :
This is definitely something couples should talk about before marriage. (Skip to the end for the question if u don't like to read because this is a long story) I did not do this, now its the only arguments we have ever had in our entire relationship and its taking a toll on me!! No matter I would still have loved him and married him, but it still should be discussed prior too! Here's the story my loving caring perfect for me husband is amazing, but financially he is very irresponsible. I knew he had bills but he failed to fully inform me how bad he was in the hole, when I informed him on the bills I had prior to marriage. I take care of my own bills that i had prior to our marriage and so does he here is the biggest problem. He was in a 3 year relationship before he was with me. In this relationship he was living the marriage life-style without being married, sharing a bank account, credit cards, rent, car etc. etc. He racked up on debt with his x and failed to think hmm what if this doesn't work out its very easy to just walk away we aren't married! Anyway he took out a debt consolidation loan jointly with her to resolve their stupid financial mistakes. They were living beyond their means and it backfired. So of coarse they split and what happens... HELL! They now had to solve what was what! He basically took the bills with his name and she took the ones with hers ignoring the ones they had jointly. So when we start dating she gets angry of coarse because she wants him back and he makes it plainly obvious that he was going to choose me (they weren't together when we met but she was still fighting to get him back he is a really good guy just not financially lol) , so now she is a woman scorned(hell hath no fury). So he then joins the army while in the basic he sent her three checks to pay their debt consolidation loan. I of coarse advise against this reminding him of how hurt and angry she is!! No he didn't listen she took that money paid her rent and went on a vacation to the beach, she went out with a bang and still has him hanging by the neck with this loan or should i say hanging by the balls! He also has a closed (so far overdrawn they said hell no u cant keep this account open) suntrust account with her, that he jointly owned and still jointly owes money on! So when he gets out of basic ait then airborne we get married about a month later. As we are planning for our fairytale love future together we start the topic of bills, the drama with us to now begins...prior to this we had never had a serious argument besides the petty why didn't u call or call back stuff! I basically(during arguing) tell him he needs to take care of it because its going to affect us getting anything such as a house or car later and I feel like he kept a lot of this from me before when we discussed our bills prior to marriage and he left out a lot a whole lot! I don't know if he was embarrassed but I still feel it should have been discussed. So I tell him to call her and all of the bills they share and straighten things out. Results: Citifinancial will not divide the loan but because he explained him trying to pay but his x pocketing the money then being in training he was in a hard place, so they put him in good standing with the account and set him up with decent payments. Then he talked to his x and she said how much she could pay a month. With the suntrust he told her he would get back to her but when he tried she didn't answer its been 4 days since he talked to her and she has yet to answer so i went on her facebook its public so any1 can see (i love facebook) and her status read " i wonder if i don't respond for 2 days... will he get the point." this was written yesterday. So me knowing how an angry woman can be i don't believe she is going to pay without legal action. Here are my questions: - Is this a matter for small claims court? -Am I wrong for telling him I want to be in charge of paying all the bills, and I will come to him every time one of us gets paid and tell him what I will be paying, but I will be the one physically in charge of doing it? I think he feels emasculated by me saying I don't think he can handle the bills! -Was I wrong for opening a joint savings account for both of us to put money into ( he didn't know it was going to be joint he thought it was going to be for me but he put money in it also. then he open a checking with the same bank later, even though he said he wanted to do it he felt i should have at least let him know) -How does my husband file against her? (requesting her to pay half of the loan minus any bills or purchases that are proven to be his) -what would be the best evidence to bring to court? - what if she is ordered to pay at court but time goes by and she still hasn't paid? how long is she given to pay it? -do u think taking her to court as I have been suggesting for the past 2 months is a http://www.OnlineBusinessMall.com- website did not help whatsoever lol but thanks for trying http://carekorner.com same as other website no help but again thanks http://www.lifeplanz.com/ lol i don't need a job i need my questions answered
Personal Finance - 3 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Calling the creditors and asking them to split the loans between your husband and his ex isn't going to help - they aren't going to do it. Each of them is legally responsible for the entire amounts of any joint debts, and the creditors will get it from whoever they can get it from. And what would you expect from small claims court? You/he has no case there either. Yes this should have all been clear before you were married, but that doesn't help now. You'd be wise to keep your own finances separate from your husband's (NO joint accounts) until this is all paid off.
2 :
Hi Unfortunately most of the companies online that offer debt relief are scams.I can suggest you one of them that really works... no doubt. They helped me to save more than 30% ... If you are serious about that, Go to http://DebtHelper.info Hope that was helpful
3 :
I didnt want to read your long as hell question but saw ur confused about money. Hit up militaryonesource.com or call them. they have tons of resources and you talk to real people. its all free for military
Read more other entries :
Monday, May 14, 2012
How do I get my phone back?
How do I get my phone back?
earlier this year I really went 'off the rails' I was drinking, sneaking out and just generally getting involved with the wrong crowd. Then about four months ago, my parents took my phone and computer and put all these rules down to make me behave. It's been four months and I've got my computer back, some of my freedom and a little respect. but still no phone. ----EXAMPLES---- [you dont need to read them all] It sucks and is just REALLY annoying. Like friday night I went to see a movie with my friends and during the night, my dad was texting all my friends to discuss how i was getting home [he cant drive atm] but i'd already arranged for someone to take me home. In the end [thanks to all his messing] three different people -including my mom- were all waiting outside to take me home. If my dad had just been able to call me, I could've told him I was being taken how by my friend, and I'd be back before 11. Or on saturday night, it was my friends birthday, so about 10 of us girls went out for pizza. then at the end everyone had gone home and her parents were waiting an extra 45mintues after everyone had left to make sure I wasn't there by myself. My mom had fallen asleep and the only reason she came is because I borrowed my friends phone and called her and was like "um, sorry mom but everyones gone - can you pick me up like now?" I literally don't talk to anyone outside school [my parents deleted my facebook] and its pretty hard for me to get invited out anywhere because whenever i ask why i wasn't invited its because "we couldnt contact you to ask you". The only time I talk to someone outside of school is if i call them. and thats pretty hard because all the numbers are on my phone. I've lost all my friends outside of school because I dont talk to them anymore. ---EXAMPLES--- I know I did wrong, but I really need my phone. And four months is a long time - I've learnt my lesson! Since I got caught, i dont hang out with anyone outside school. and i literally NEED my phone back. Summer is coming up [two weeks] adn my dad cant drive atm, so I'm gonna be taking rides with friends or using public transport a lot. I'm moving to victoria at the end of summer, so i intend on spending all summer at the beach with my friends. I'm even considering asking for my phone for my birthday [december 15th]. my dad said i can have my phone back january 1st. but im spending nearly the whole of january in london, so its not like i can use it anyway. Do you think if i tell my dad he can check my phone every night and check my bill? Thanks xx p.s. i'm 14...nearly 15.
Adolescent - 3 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I think that you should tell your dad that yes, you were wrong when you sneaked out and partied, but that honestly if he gave you back the phone then he would have more control over you. (Not exactly true but it does make a good point.) You should tell him these examples, but remember to also put in not just good things about getting back the phone, but show that you were wrong because honestly it will look a bit strange if having a phone is all 100% good. Say that he can check on you when he wants, see who you're with and be much safer in general and arrangements would be simpler. Good Luck!
2 :
You're not hanging out with friends who aren't from school, and you'll be in London soon anyway, so why do you need the phone? You're just addicted to it or you want to contact those people who got you in trouble again. Looks like your dad is hard core and won't relent until January 1st. Good for him!
3 :
You should tell them what you just wrote to us... And add that it will be a lot easier to comunicate w/ them and let them know where you are if you have a phone... :)
Read more other entries :
earlier this year I really went 'off the rails' I was drinking, sneaking out and just generally getting involved with the wrong crowd. Then about four months ago, my parents took my phone and computer and put all these rules down to make me behave. It's been four months and I've got my computer back, some of my freedom and a little respect. but still no phone. ----EXAMPLES---- [you dont need to read them all] It sucks and is just REALLY annoying. Like friday night I went to see a movie with my friends and during the night, my dad was texting all my friends to discuss how i was getting home [he cant drive atm] but i'd already arranged for someone to take me home. In the end [thanks to all his messing] three different people -including my mom- were all waiting outside to take me home. If my dad had just been able to call me, I could've told him I was being taken how by my friend, and I'd be back before 11. Or on saturday night, it was my friends birthday, so about 10 of us girls went out for pizza. then at the end everyone had gone home and her parents were waiting an extra 45mintues after everyone had left to make sure I wasn't there by myself. My mom had fallen asleep and the only reason she came is because I borrowed my friends phone and called her and was like "um, sorry mom but everyones gone - can you pick me up like now?" I literally don't talk to anyone outside school [my parents deleted my facebook] and its pretty hard for me to get invited out anywhere because whenever i ask why i wasn't invited its because "we couldnt contact you to ask you". The only time I talk to someone outside of school is if i call them. and thats pretty hard because all the numbers are on my phone. I've lost all my friends outside of school because I dont talk to them anymore. ---EXAMPLES--- I know I did wrong, but I really need my phone. And four months is a long time - I've learnt my lesson! Since I got caught, i dont hang out with anyone outside school. and i literally NEED my phone back. Summer is coming up [two weeks] adn my dad cant drive atm, so I'm gonna be taking rides with friends or using public transport a lot. I'm moving to victoria at the end of summer, so i intend on spending all summer at the beach with my friends. I'm even considering asking for my phone for my birthday [december 15th]. my dad said i can have my phone back january 1st. but im spending nearly the whole of january in london, so its not like i can use it anyway. Do you think if i tell my dad he can check my phone every night and check my bill? Thanks xx p.s. i'm 14...nearly 15.
Adolescent - 3 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I think that you should tell your dad that yes, you were wrong when you sneaked out and partied, but that honestly if he gave you back the phone then he would have more control over you. (Not exactly true but it does make a good point.) You should tell him these examples, but remember to also put in not just good things about getting back the phone, but show that you were wrong because honestly it will look a bit strange if having a phone is all 100% good. Say that he can check on you when he wants, see who you're with and be much safer in general and arrangements would be simpler. Good Luck!
2 :
You're not hanging out with friends who aren't from school, and you'll be in London soon anyway, so why do you need the phone? You're just addicted to it or you want to contact those people who got you in trouble again. Looks like your dad is hard core and won't relent until January 1st. Good for him!
3 :
You should tell them what you just wrote to us... And add that it will be a lot easier to comunicate w/ them and let them know where you are if you have a phone... :)
Read more other entries :
Monday, May 7, 2012
Will He Ever Get Over It?
Will He Ever Get Over It?
I've been seeing D for a few weeks, although he's liked me for years. He's funny, smart, and sooo fun to be around. I'm smitten. That is of course, until I ruined everything. I hadn't seen D in over a week because we're both really busy. I was so excited to see him, but he cancelled on our beach date and instead just came over to my house later. I was disappointed, because it started to feel more like a booty call than a date, and I was awkward and cold until he left. I later realized that I was overreacting, he still came to see me, we haven't slept together or anything (so it OF COURSE wasn't a booty call). We had plans to hangout the next night, but he blew me off for being too tired. I instantly was livid and assumed he must be over me. I had an ex who lied and cheated. I know these things (or so I thought). In my fury, I text D and say that I'm sorry for acting weird the other night, BUT if all he wants is a f*** buddy, I'm not it and I don't like wasting my time. To make a long story short, my best friend took matters into her own hands and posted this SUPER old picture of me kissing our guy friend (the picture was a joke - the friend surprise-kissed me for the picture, we've never hooked up) on Facebook to make D jealous. I didn't hear from D for three days (when usually he texts me all day long), so I texted him and asked where he'd been. He was furious about the picture (which surprised me because we never talked about being exclusive), and said that I called him a waste of time. I explained that the picture was not only a TOTAL joke, it was from forever ago. He thought that the picture had been from a night when I was supposed to go to D's house - which I don't even know what he's talking about! I then explained that I love hanging out with him, and I would never call him a waste of time! I just meant that I didn't want to waste my time if all he wanted was sex, and I don't think he does (I was just being insecure). He didn't believe me, would barely discuss it, and told me he "had to go". I miss him and like him more than ever and I'm furious with my friend for posting the picture, and even more mad at myself for allowing insecurity from a bad ex ruin things with D. What can I do? It's been a week since I'd tried to explain. He hasn't contacted me since. =( Help!
Singles & Dating - 1 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Move on get over it he doesn't trust you and wont believe you relationships are built on trust
Read more other entries :
I've been seeing D for a few weeks, although he's liked me for years. He's funny, smart, and sooo fun to be around. I'm smitten. That is of course, until I ruined everything. I hadn't seen D in over a week because we're both really busy. I was so excited to see him, but he cancelled on our beach date and instead just came over to my house later. I was disappointed, because it started to feel more like a booty call than a date, and I was awkward and cold until he left. I later realized that I was overreacting, he still came to see me, we haven't slept together or anything (so it OF COURSE wasn't a booty call). We had plans to hangout the next night, but he blew me off for being too tired. I instantly was livid and assumed he must be over me. I had an ex who lied and cheated. I know these things (or so I thought). In my fury, I text D and say that I'm sorry for acting weird the other night, BUT if all he wants is a f*** buddy, I'm not it and I don't like wasting my time. To make a long story short, my best friend took matters into her own hands and posted this SUPER old picture of me kissing our guy friend (the picture was a joke - the friend surprise-kissed me for the picture, we've never hooked up) on Facebook to make D jealous. I didn't hear from D for three days (when usually he texts me all day long), so I texted him and asked where he'd been. He was furious about the picture (which surprised me because we never talked about being exclusive), and said that I called him a waste of time. I explained that the picture was not only a TOTAL joke, it was from forever ago. He thought that the picture had been from a night when I was supposed to go to D's house - which I don't even know what he's talking about! I then explained that I love hanging out with him, and I would never call him a waste of time! I just meant that I didn't want to waste my time if all he wanted was sex, and I don't think he does (I was just being insecure). He didn't believe me, would barely discuss it, and told me he "had to go". I miss him and like him more than ever and I'm furious with my friend for posting the picture, and even more mad at myself for allowing insecurity from a bad ex ruin things with D. What can I do? It's been a week since I'd tried to explain. He hasn't contacted me since. =( Help!
Singles & Dating - 1 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Move on get over it he doesn't trust you and wont believe you relationships are built on trust
Read more other entries :
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Should I Email My Girlfriend A Little Long, Please Help!!?
Should I Email My Girlfriend A Little Long, Please Help!!?
I've had a girlfriend since June 3rd. She went to Hawaii for various reasons: She needs to lifeguard at Ewa Beach, has family there (she's half Hawaiian and very beautiful) and has to take some PSAT prep courses. Basically like a summer school. She's taking them there because she also has a home in Hawaii and it seemed better to her from her telling me about it. But there have been some problems. This guy (who was a childhood friend of hers) changed her relationship status on facebook and said that she is in a relationship with him and not me. I called and asked her about it, she was busy at the time but she briefly told me that he has her facebook password and he's "just messing with my profile." Now, I'm starting to have doubts though. I don't know if I can trust her on that even though she is a very understanding person in general. The guy blocked me from her and now I can't even see her profile. If he has just been messing around with her profile on facebook only I wouldn't worry too much but if he's calling her.. Telling her that he wants her or something, that's what I should be worried about. The last time I spoke to her on the phone was about the change on the facebook profile and I've tried calling her and there has been no answer. We promised not to see other people (as in dating others). I've only met the guy once so confronting him is probably not a good idea. So should I try to email her saying I really want to discuss things with you? Or should I just leave her? I'm going to be 18 tomorrow so I really don't know what to do!! My girlfriend is 16 years old.
Singles & Dating - 2 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Leave her. If you act all desperate you'll push her to the other guy. Leave her to make her mind up and if she chooses the other guy then you wouldn't have worked out anyway. The fact that he knows her facebook password is a little weird but he's obviously worried about you. If they were in a strong relationship you wouldn't be a threat. Just back off and let her come to you.
2 :
Leave her because if he has her password then they are VERY close. Far too close for a girl who's supposed to be in a relationship. She's not taking the relationship as serious as you are, so you need to let it go. She's allowing this to feed into her desire to feel wanted, and you being frustrated about it will only make her feel important. You don't need that, move on.
Read more other entries :
I've had a girlfriend since June 3rd. She went to Hawaii for various reasons: She needs to lifeguard at Ewa Beach, has family there (she's half Hawaiian and very beautiful) and has to take some PSAT prep courses. Basically like a summer school. She's taking them there because she also has a home in Hawaii and it seemed better to her from her telling me about it. But there have been some problems. This guy (who was a childhood friend of hers) changed her relationship status on facebook and said that she is in a relationship with him and not me. I called and asked her about it, she was busy at the time but she briefly told me that he has her facebook password and he's "just messing with my profile." Now, I'm starting to have doubts though. I don't know if I can trust her on that even though she is a very understanding person in general. The guy blocked me from her and now I can't even see her profile. If he has just been messing around with her profile on facebook only I wouldn't worry too much but if he's calling her.. Telling her that he wants her or something, that's what I should be worried about. The last time I spoke to her on the phone was about the change on the facebook profile and I've tried calling her and there has been no answer. We promised not to see other people (as in dating others). I've only met the guy once so confronting him is probably not a good idea. So should I try to email her saying I really want to discuss things with you? Or should I just leave her? I'm going to be 18 tomorrow so I really don't know what to do!! My girlfriend is 16 years old.
Singles & Dating - 2 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Leave her. If you act all desperate you'll push her to the other guy. Leave her to make her mind up and if she chooses the other guy then you wouldn't have worked out anyway. The fact that he knows her facebook password is a little weird but he's obviously worried about you. If they were in a strong relationship you wouldn't be a threat. Just back off and let her come to you.
2 :
Leave her because if he has her password then they are VERY close. Far too close for a girl who's supposed to be in a relationship. She's not taking the relationship as serious as you are, so you need to let it go. She's allowing this to feed into her desire to feel wanted, and you being frustrated about it will only make her feel important. You don't need that, move on.
Read more other entries :
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)