How can I stop being jealous? Paranoid jealous?
Quick summary of the bits you need to know: My boyfriend had a really bad bout of manic bipolar this past summer. The mania got really bad and he left me then hooked up with a girl from high school that he had started talking to a lot on FB. We got back together said he had changed his ways. I believed him and it was true. Don't worry about details, just know where I'm coming from. Now we've been so busy with work and school and family that I feel we've grown apart since we haven't been seeing each other lately. He's moving into a new apartment, he heard it was available cause it was owned by this acquaintance of his on FB a couple weeks before. He gets it, Moves in, now when he posts something about it she's always got 2 cents to put. And is talking about how her ex boyfriend put the dents in the front door, and how he's jealous of my boyfriend because he's crazy and thinks they are cheating together. 1) I really don't like them talking about this all over facebook. 2) I am very jealous and it was the end of me and my boyfriends date night tonight and he reads the newest comment from her and answers it. Then when I'm telling him goodnight I see that just before he texted me he replied to another one of her comments. I know he's not cheating on me, because she moved 2000 miles away. But how can I get rid of this paranoia that he's going to leave me or she's trying to pry him away from me. I just find it so rude that they're discussing cheating and shit all over facebook and I can't seem to look away. It's really upsetting me, which I know is wrong and I want to know how to stop! Should I ask her to not talk about that stuff? Also I can't really confront him about it, because I trust him and I see him trying to steer the convo away but she keeps bringing up details and stuff. And if i were to confront him he would see it as I don't trust him. I really want to know how to either get rid of this ridiculous paranoid jealousy or how to stop this discussion of theirs if that's what you feel is necessary.
Psychology - 1 Answers
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1 :
Jealousy is a useless emotion. It doesn't help you or the person your involved with. And it looks bad. There's no concrete advice that's gonna help you with this powerfully negative emotion. All I can tell you is this..try to care a little less. Whatever happens is going to happen no matter what. And jealousy is only going to give the bearer grief, sadness, and the feeling that your losing control. Why let this person have that much power over you? Be strong and listen to your head not your heart. Unless you wanna continue to surround yourself with never ending drama? Good luck to you
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