Please analyze my current situation (10 pts for the most complete, well thought out answer)?
So my ex boyfriend( who I’ll call Kevin) and I were together for a whole year. We celebrated our one-year anniversary the day before new years day. Things seemed so wonderful, but we were having certain issues that definitely needed to be addressed and resolved. We were going to work them out, we said how much we loved each other, etc. That day, he gave me a bracelet, read me a poem about how much he loved me, mentioned things we should do together in the future, etc. I know his parents had issues with me and he was somewhat influenced by them. They are very intense and get overly involved. But anyway Kevin loved me. So on New Years day after that entire day we spent together, i thought he was going to come to my house so we can discuss the problems. Instead he confusingly breaks up with me. It was pretty nasty... Later that night he said on the phone that he honestly thinks we’re just better off as friends. But since then he’s been avoiding me in school. It’s so awkward and uncomfortable if we walk past each other. I’ve waved politely, but he pretends not to see me. So a couple weeks after the break up, I visited my grandparents in Florida, which was a great getaway. I also visited my great friend Peter from my sleepaway camp. We had a thing one summer but it didn’t go that far and we’re just great friends now and both cool. So anyway I took so many pictures with him (arm-in-arm, hugging, etc. and posted them on facebook). We’re just best friends hugging, but I thought Kevin might get the wrong impression. By the way I removed my relationship status after the break up. The next day I noticed that Kevin removed me as a friend, and put that he’s in a relationship with one of his best friends Rachel. Rachel is very vulnerable and will say yes to pretty much anyone. However, Kevin has never been attracted to her and she is totally not his type like that. We haven’t really spoke since New Years day, and things just feel so uncomfortable when I see him in school. I don’t get it! He says he loves me, then he doesn’t, then he wants to be friends, now he’s shutting me out completely?!?!?! Please analyze my current situation bc I just have no closure and it’s been really difficult. Please don’t just say I need to move on bc I know I do. I’m making progress as time goes on. We’re both 16 by the way.
Singles & Dating - 3 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
i'm going through a break up too so i know where you're coming from. chances are he saw the pictures of you being close with that guy and got jealous. i think he still loves you and is just trying to get back at you so he got a new girlfriend. he's definitely not over you. he probably meant what he said when he said he wanted to be friends but found that in reality it's much more difficult than it seems. i think you should talk to him about it. just ask what's going on with him getting a new gf and just a couple weeks earlier he proclaimed his love for you. i think he still does love you and his parents are just getting to him. i think you should talk it out.
2 :
First of all I want to say I'm sorry you're going through that...You said things were wonderful, then basically out of nowhere he breaks up with you, and that he was influenced by his parents. Maybe he talked to his parents about the problems you guys were having and since his parents had issues with you, they might have told him to break up with you or something along those lines. And him seeing the pictures on facebook he probably thought you moved on already and it probably made him sad or upset so he removed you as a friend. He might be using Rachel as a rebound girl to try and get over you. But after you guys were together for a year, I doubt that he would be over you that fast. I'm sure he still has feelings for you, he just doesn't know what to do or doesn't know how to tell you whats going on with him. Maybe you can ask a mutual friend about why he did that since he's not talking to you. Either way, I hope things work out for you and you at least get SOME closure. Good luck hun!
3 :
From my perspective of the situation it sounds like you two definitely need to talk. I don't know why he broke up with you, but if it bothers you this its something to find out. Ask him if you can talk to him alone. Try not to make it too much of an oppressive setting. Try somewhere open and airy so he doesn't feel trapped or interrogated. When you talk to him, even when you ask to talk to him, make sure you're asking and not demanding the questions be answered. Stay calm and try not to get emotional if you can help it. Crying or getting angry might push him away. Now you mentioned that the girl Rachel is one of his best friends? If they're that close its probably because they have compatible personalities. You say you don't think she's his type but maybe they really hit it off. Its hard to admit but we don't always know everything about the people we love. Also people change. Lastly, If he offers you a reason after you talk you may have to just accept it. You can tell him you don't understand and ask for further explanation. You don't want to go much farther than that though. You have to let him go. Try to salvage a friendship from this situation. I don't necessarily mean "move on" but maybe if he has enough space to move around he can move back to you. Hope this helps. Good luck and use your intuition.
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Sunday, July 24, 2011
Which one of my kids' mothers should I be with? My wife, my ex-girlfriend or my current girlfriend?
Which one of my kids' mothers should I be with? My wife, my ex-girlfriend or my current girlfriend?
I swear on everything that I'm not trolling. I am in love with my wife, my ex-girlfriend(first love) and my current girlfriend. I'm 40 years old and I feel like a stupid teenage boy for doing this to them because they are all amazing women. All of whom I have a child with or expecting a child with. So, I have to make a choice and I'd appreciate some advice and opinions. I met and fell in love with Rachel while we were in college and we dated steadily for over three years(1988-1991). I was just beginning to shed my "nerd" image after high school and Rachel became my first love when I got into college. We lost our virginity together and everything. During my fourth year in college in 1991, I had to spend four months in Europe studying abroad. Rachel and I had a big argument before I left for Europe but we didn't exactly breakup. While I was in Europe, I met Jenny. Although I've never seen her around campus, she was also studying abroad and she was attending the same college as Rachel and me. Jenny and I started studying together and then dating and then falling in love. The closer I got to Jenny, the farther apart I got from Rachel. When I returned to Florida, I told Rachel that I fell for someone else so we broke up and it broke her heart. Jenny and I stayed together, finished college, got married in 1996, had our daughter Tammi in 1999 and our son Damien in 2001. Jenny and I had a great marriage and I NEVER cheated until last year. Rachel and I reunited via Facebook in March 2009 through a mutual former classmate. She's divorced and she has a son around my kids' age; her ex-husband was an abusive jerk. Sparks started flying again, we met up in person and I proceeded to have an affair with Rachel while married to Jennifer. I still love Rachel but I had no plans on leaving Jenny. Rachel feels no remorse about dating me because she feels as though Jenny "robbed" her of what she could have had with me. True. In college, Jennifer did tell me to make a choice between her and Rachel and I chose Jennifer. So, I guess Rachel is still bitter after all these years. After two months of reconnecting with Rachel, Jenny found out about her. She was hurt and she told me to leave. So, I moved out in May 2009 but we still remained legally married. Although I continue to sleep with Rachel, I wasn't ready to commit myself to her because I was still sad about separating from Jenny. Even when Rachel got pregnant and gave birth to our daughter Destiny in April 2010, I still didn't commit. In July 2009, I met Stephanie. She was single, beautiful, smart, funny and sweet. She's 13 years my junior but she's VERY mature. Stephanie and I have been dating ever since then and we moved in together five months ago. I'm really in love with Stephanie and she's 3 months pregnant now. I'm going to admit that ever since Jenny and I separated, we would occasionally spend the night together, have sex and sometimes discuss reconciling. Just like I'm in a relationship with Stephanie, Jenny has a boyfriend of her own. Now, Jennifer is sick of "playing games" with me, she told me if I want to give our marriage another chance she will dump her boyfriend Andrew and I'll have to dump Stephanie pregnant or not. Or else, she's staying with Andrew, I'm staying with Stephanie and we're getting a divorce. It's a hard decision, especially with all these children involved. I'm in love with Jenny, our marriage was wonderful and it was that ONE mistake with Rachel that ruined it all. Not to mention, Jenny and I have two amazing kids who misses having both their parents together. I love Rachel with all my heart and I always looked back and felt bad about the way I betrayed her in college. So I do feel as though I owe her for that. I always wondered what would have happened if I married her instead. She NEVER would have wound up with such a monster for a husband. The more I look at the precious baby girl I have with Rachel it breaks me down and I cry. But I'm VERY happy with Stephanie and I love her so much. She's giving me my fourth child and I'm giving her her first. I'm sure she knows that I still have feelings for my wife but she has NO that I'm still seeing Rachel but she does know about our child. I don't want to keep doing this. Whichever one I choose, the other two will be hurt. What would you do if you were me? Also, for all you racists out there, if you're assuming that I'm a black man, you're wrong.
Parenting - 8 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I'm sorry that I just dont have the time or interest to read that whole blurb and your race makes no difference to me. Bottom line is that you should have never had three children with three different women-bottom line. Thats all I have to say.
2 :
PIMP.... Oh yeah. Be with all of them!
3 :
I stopped reading when I saw you had kids with Tammi. Any woman that has your kids deserves a huge amount of favor over everyone else period.
4 :
Sorry didn't read that whole thing....way too much like a soap opera. Hard to believe you are 40 years old and living this life.
5 :
I finished reading after the first few lines..anyhow, I assume you should be with your wife. All the old NEWS needs to stay in the past where they belong.
6 :
First of all you should never date somebody because you think you owe it to them. People lead the lives they want. Your wife already has a man, so you should leave her alone. Try to build your life with Stephanie. Now if you don't like what I just said, and you were wishing I had said somebody else then thats who you should truly try to make a life with. Nobody can tell you to date one person or the other. You sound like a hound dog that can't control himself and in the process you are ruining 3 women's lives. Get your head straight, get your act together, grow a pair, and be a man...not a dog!
7 :
None of them - regardless of the story (too long to read) - you don't deserve any of them.
8 :
try working it out with the woman you are married to...or do all of them a favor and leave them all alone.
Read more other entries :
I swear on everything that I'm not trolling. I am in love with my wife, my ex-girlfriend(first love) and my current girlfriend. I'm 40 years old and I feel like a stupid teenage boy for doing this to them because they are all amazing women. All of whom I have a child with or expecting a child with. So, I have to make a choice and I'd appreciate some advice and opinions. I met and fell in love with Rachel while we were in college and we dated steadily for over three years(1988-1991). I was just beginning to shed my "nerd" image after high school and Rachel became my first love when I got into college. We lost our virginity together and everything. During my fourth year in college in 1991, I had to spend four months in Europe studying abroad. Rachel and I had a big argument before I left for Europe but we didn't exactly breakup. While I was in Europe, I met Jenny. Although I've never seen her around campus, she was also studying abroad and she was attending the same college as Rachel and me. Jenny and I started studying together and then dating and then falling in love. The closer I got to Jenny, the farther apart I got from Rachel. When I returned to Florida, I told Rachel that I fell for someone else so we broke up and it broke her heart. Jenny and I stayed together, finished college, got married in 1996, had our daughter Tammi in 1999 and our son Damien in 2001. Jenny and I had a great marriage and I NEVER cheated until last year. Rachel and I reunited via Facebook in March 2009 through a mutual former classmate. She's divorced and she has a son around my kids' age; her ex-husband was an abusive jerk. Sparks started flying again, we met up in person and I proceeded to have an affair with Rachel while married to Jennifer. I still love Rachel but I had no plans on leaving Jenny. Rachel feels no remorse about dating me because she feels as though Jenny "robbed" her of what she could have had with me. True. In college, Jennifer did tell me to make a choice between her and Rachel and I chose Jennifer. So, I guess Rachel is still bitter after all these years. After two months of reconnecting with Rachel, Jenny found out about her. She was hurt and she told me to leave. So, I moved out in May 2009 but we still remained legally married. Although I continue to sleep with Rachel, I wasn't ready to commit myself to her because I was still sad about separating from Jenny. Even when Rachel got pregnant and gave birth to our daughter Destiny in April 2010, I still didn't commit. In July 2009, I met Stephanie. She was single, beautiful, smart, funny and sweet. She's 13 years my junior but she's VERY mature. Stephanie and I have been dating ever since then and we moved in together five months ago. I'm really in love with Stephanie and she's 3 months pregnant now. I'm going to admit that ever since Jenny and I separated, we would occasionally spend the night together, have sex and sometimes discuss reconciling. Just like I'm in a relationship with Stephanie, Jenny has a boyfriend of her own. Now, Jennifer is sick of "playing games" with me, she told me if I want to give our marriage another chance she will dump her boyfriend Andrew and I'll have to dump Stephanie pregnant or not. Or else, she's staying with Andrew, I'm staying with Stephanie and we're getting a divorce. It's a hard decision, especially with all these children involved. I'm in love with Jenny, our marriage was wonderful and it was that ONE mistake with Rachel that ruined it all. Not to mention, Jenny and I have two amazing kids who misses having both their parents together. I love Rachel with all my heart and I always looked back and felt bad about the way I betrayed her in college. So I do feel as though I owe her for that. I always wondered what would have happened if I married her instead. She NEVER would have wound up with such a monster for a husband. The more I look at the precious baby girl I have with Rachel it breaks me down and I cry. But I'm VERY happy with Stephanie and I love her so much. She's giving me my fourth child and I'm giving her her first. I'm sure she knows that I still have feelings for my wife but she has NO that I'm still seeing Rachel but she does know about our child. I don't want to keep doing this. Whichever one I choose, the other two will be hurt. What would you do if you were me? Also, for all you racists out there, if you're assuming that I'm a black man, you're wrong.
Parenting - 8 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I'm sorry that I just dont have the time or interest to read that whole blurb and your race makes no difference to me. Bottom line is that you should have never had three children with three different women-bottom line. Thats all I have to say.
2 :
PIMP.... Oh yeah. Be with all of them!
3 :
I stopped reading when I saw you had kids with Tammi. Any woman that has your kids deserves a huge amount of favor over everyone else period.
4 :
Sorry didn't read that whole thing....way too much like a soap opera. Hard to believe you are 40 years old and living this life.
5 :
I finished reading after the first few lines..anyhow, I assume you should be with your wife. All the old NEWS needs to stay in the past where they belong.
6 :
First of all you should never date somebody because you think you owe it to them. People lead the lives they want. Your wife already has a man, so you should leave her alone. Try to build your life with Stephanie. Now if you don't like what I just said, and you were wishing I had said somebody else then thats who you should truly try to make a life with. Nobody can tell you to date one person or the other. You sound like a hound dog that can't control himself and in the process you are ruining 3 women's lives. Get your head straight, get your act together, grow a pair, and be a man...not a dog!
7 :
None of them - regardless of the story (too long to read) - you don't deserve any of them.
8 :
try working it out with the woman you are married to...or do all of them a favor and leave them all alone.
Read more other entries :
With 2 kids with my wife, 1 daughter with my ex and a currently pregnant girlfriend, what's a man to do?
With 2 kids with my wife, 1 daughter with my ex and a currently pregnant girlfriend, what's a man to do?
I swear on everything that I'm not trolling. I am in love with my wife, my ex-girlfriend(first love) and my current girlfriend. I'm 40 years old and I feel like a stupid teenage boy for doing this to them because they are all amazing women. All of whom I have a child with or expecting a child with. So, I have to make a choice and I'd appreciate some advice and opinions. I met and fell in love with Rachel while we were in college and we dated steadily for over three years(1988-1991). I was just beginning to shed my "nerd" image after high school and Rachel became my first love when I got into college. We lost our virginity together and everything. During my fourth year in college in 1991, I had to spend four months in Europe studying abroad. Rachel and I had a big argument before I left for Europe but we didn't exactly breakup. While I was in Europe, I met Jenny. Although I've never seen her around campus, she was also studying abroad and she was attending the same college as Rachel and me. Jenny and I started studying together and then dating and then falling in love. The closer I got to Jenny, the farther apart I got from Rachel. When I returned to Florida, I told Rachel that I fell for someone else so we broke up and it broke her heart. Jenny and I stayed together, finished college, got married in 1996, had our daughter Tammi in 1999 and our son Damien in 2001. Jenny and I had a great marriage and I NEVER cheated until last year. Rachel and I reunited via Facebook in March 2009 through a mutual former classmate. She's divorced and she has a son around my kids' age; her ex-husband was an abusive jerk. Sparks started flying again, we met up in person and I proceeded to have an affair with Rachel while married to Jennifer. I still love Rachel but I had no plans on leaving Jenny. Rachel feels no remorse about dating me because she feels as though Jenny "robbed" her of what she could have had with me. True. In college, Jennifer did tell me to make a choice between her and Rachel and I chose Jennifer. So, I guess Rachel is still bitter after all these years. After two months of reconnecting with Rachel, Jenny found out about her. She was hurt and she told me to leave. So, I moved out in May 2009 but we still remained legally married. Although I continue to sleep with Rachel, I wasn't ready to commit myself to her because I was still sad about separating from Jenny. Even when Rachel got pregnant and gave birth to our daughter Destiny in April 2010, I still didn't commit. In July 2009, I met Stephanie. She was single, beautiful, smart, funny and sweet. She's 13 years my junior but she's VERY mature. Stephanie and I have been dating ever since then and we moved in together five months ago. I'm really in love with Stephanie and she's 3 months pregnant now. I'm going to admit that ever since Jenny and I separated, we would occasionally spend the night together, have sex and sometimes discuss reconciling. Just like I'm in a relationship with Stephanie, Jenny has a boyfriend of her own. Now, Jennifer is sick of "playing games" with me, she told me if I want to give our marriage another chance she will dump her boyfriend Andrew and I'll have to dump Stephanie pregnant or not. Or else, she's staying with Andrew, I'm staying with Stephanie and we're getting a divorce. It's a hard decision, especially with all these children involved. I'm in love with Jenny, our marriage was wonderful and it was that ONE mistake with Rachel that ruined it all. Not to mention, Jenny and I have two amazing kids who misses having both their parents together. I love Rachel with all my heart and I always looked back and felt bad about the way I betrayed her in college. So I do feel as though I owe her for that. I always wondered what would have happened if I married her instead. She NEVER would have wound up with such a monster for a husband. The more I look at the precious baby girl I have with Rachel it breaks me down and I cry. But I'm VERY happy with Stephanie and I love her so much. She's giving me my fourth child and I'm giving her her first. I'm sure she knows that I still have feelings for my wife but she has NO that I'm still seeing Rachel but she does know about our child. I don't want to keep doing this. Whichever one I choose, the other two will be hurt. What would you do if you were me? Also, for all you racists out there, if you're assuming that I'm a black man, you're wrong.
Pregnancy - 16 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Wow
2 :
Get a vasectomy. Jeez.
3 :
ITS CALLED A CONDOM
4 :
i got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one. Also, for all you racists out there, if you're assuming that I'm a black man, you're right.
5 :
im speechless.
6 :
You should have stayed with your wife Jenny and not messed around with anyone else in the first place. Now you've made this mess. Why don't you let the women get together and decide what you should do
7 :
does your wife know you have cheated?
8 :
wear a condom...
9 :
The time to grow up was approx. 11 years ago when your first child was born. You made a commitment and you brought a child (and then another) into this world who want and expect and deserve two parents. It would be different if there were something irreparable happen in your marriage to make you separate but it was in fact your serial infidelity that caused it. Once you married and brought 2 other people into the relationship (your kids, not your girlfriends) you ceased to be the dating Cassanova that you once fancied yourself. It's time to take a hard look at yourself and who you've become and see if it is something you and your children can be truly proud of. Grow up, go home, and prepare for some hefty child support payments.
10 :
I sure hope you have a very good job.. cause I know that Child support is going to hurt something fierce.. Best to stay with Steph. Jenny will never fully recover from what you did to her. She might say she will, but if my husband left and then proceeded to get 2 different women pregnant then I could never trust him ever again. As for Rachel, your not in love with her, You just pity her and like getting sex from her every now and again. So it's best to stay with Steph and get your balls snipped.
11 :
wow. learn to settle downn..... with oneeee person
12 :
OMG! Is this a scene from Days of Our Lives or something? If not, you've got to be kidding me. You may, quite possibly, be the DUMBEST person alive. Not to mention completely full of yourself. I say, dump all 3 women, abandon you kids, and go eff yourself. You are all that you truly care about anyway. Why put anyone else through all the misery that is YOU! Booooo!!!
13 :
I think all those women should leave YOU alone! and poor kids.
14 :
Although I'm appalled and disgusted with your life, I would honestly like to try to answer you without condemnation. I want you to realize something about yourself. You will never be happy with one woman - that is how you are. You could choose any one of these women and believe yourself to have made the wrong decision in the future when one of life's curveballs comes into play. You have a void in your life that you are trying to fill with relationships. I'm not saying you won't find some happiness with one of them but it will never completely make you happy. Although this will sound crazy, the only way to fill that void in your life is with God. He is the absolute only thing that makes sense in this world of uncertainty and craziness. You might think no way, but I ask you to try it before your life becomes even more of a mess. After that, since Jenny is willing to get back with you and you still love her, I would recommend staying with her. She's the one you made vows to and she's the one that you should spend the rest of your life with. Of course, I would try to be in the lives of your other two children that you helped make but to make a true commitment to your wife, Jenny, to not ever be with the other two women ever again. Plus, I think you owe it to your children to be a good example to them as a father should be so they have an excellent chance of growing up to be the best adults they can be and that they can be true and committed to their future spouses as well.
15 :
First of all I think you should write a romance novel, and second of all I think that this is an extremely complicated situation that you REALLY need to think out thoroughly before you decide. I"m going to tell you my exact thoughts based off of what you have told me. 1. You should break it off with your wife. Reason: If she has someone else as well it means that she is willing to move on. I know you're worried about your kids but trust me, it would be better for you two to separate than to stay together. Your two children by Jenny would be better off growing up by split parents than ones that hold grudges against each other (and believe me, no matter how much you think everything would be all fine and dandy, there will always be that fight, always be that tension when you request to see your other children or to buy them something). Let her go, tell the kids that it's not their fault, and leave. 2. Tell Stephanie that you're seeing Rachel Reason: She will find out about it sooner or later and it's better to come from you than your ex or someone else. Also her reaction is key. If she still cares about you and is willing to forgive what you are doing, then go with it. Rachel to me, is just a "what if" situation. You want to be with her so much because of the fact that you want to know what would have happened if you stayed with her during college. The problem is, you are two different people now. What happened to her later in life was not at all your fault. You don't know if she changed at all just by spending that small amount of time with her. Let go of the fantasy of your old college fling. First love is not necessarily the last. 3.Make Stephanie know you care about her and that you want her to be apart of your life How: Take her out with your other kids and let them spend time with each other and let her know you want her apart of your other kids lives. Support her and your baby with her by just doing the simple things, such as going to her prenatal appointments. This is not a good time to stress her out, remember that. Do simple little things to show her you care, open the door for her, give her a rose, call her from work. Just be sweet and only ever think about her. If she suspects you with anyone else, nicely invite her to look through your phone or your facebook to put her mind at ease. I think you should choose Stephanie, and I hope it's not just a lust thing.
16 :
i think you need to break it off with all of them, so do the girls, because you have NO idea what you want, and who you want. 13 years is not mature, no matter what you think. just because she can spread her legs doesn't make her mature. i honestly don't think any of you are mature enough to have a relationship. i don't feel sorry for any of you, save for the kids that you're having and what they're going through. what would i do? i'd have kept it in my pants to begin with, and wouldn't have gotten married unless i was sure. your wife didn't rob her of anything, you made the choice. and to use that as an excuse is immature. if you didn't want to make the choice you shouldn't have cheated on her to begin with. it shouldn't be a hard decision if you know who you love, but with you being so fickle, you more than likely don't even know you're own name half the time. the other girl made her choice who to marry. she happened to marry a jerk. stuff happens. personally i think you all need to break it off, grow up, and stop being so selfish. pay your child support, but stop making new ones.
Read more other entries :
I swear on everything that I'm not trolling. I am in love with my wife, my ex-girlfriend(first love) and my current girlfriend. I'm 40 years old and I feel like a stupid teenage boy for doing this to them because they are all amazing women. All of whom I have a child with or expecting a child with. So, I have to make a choice and I'd appreciate some advice and opinions. I met and fell in love with Rachel while we were in college and we dated steadily for over three years(1988-1991). I was just beginning to shed my "nerd" image after high school and Rachel became my first love when I got into college. We lost our virginity together and everything. During my fourth year in college in 1991, I had to spend four months in Europe studying abroad. Rachel and I had a big argument before I left for Europe but we didn't exactly breakup. While I was in Europe, I met Jenny. Although I've never seen her around campus, she was also studying abroad and she was attending the same college as Rachel and me. Jenny and I started studying together and then dating and then falling in love. The closer I got to Jenny, the farther apart I got from Rachel. When I returned to Florida, I told Rachel that I fell for someone else so we broke up and it broke her heart. Jenny and I stayed together, finished college, got married in 1996, had our daughter Tammi in 1999 and our son Damien in 2001. Jenny and I had a great marriage and I NEVER cheated until last year. Rachel and I reunited via Facebook in March 2009 through a mutual former classmate. She's divorced and she has a son around my kids' age; her ex-husband was an abusive jerk. Sparks started flying again, we met up in person and I proceeded to have an affair with Rachel while married to Jennifer. I still love Rachel but I had no plans on leaving Jenny. Rachel feels no remorse about dating me because she feels as though Jenny "robbed" her of what she could have had with me. True. In college, Jennifer did tell me to make a choice between her and Rachel and I chose Jennifer. So, I guess Rachel is still bitter after all these years. After two months of reconnecting with Rachel, Jenny found out about her. She was hurt and she told me to leave. So, I moved out in May 2009 but we still remained legally married. Although I continue to sleep with Rachel, I wasn't ready to commit myself to her because I was still sad about separating from Jenny. Even when Rachel got pregnant and gave birth to our daughter Destiny in April 2010, I still didn't commit. In July 2009, I met Stephanie. She was single, beautiful, smart, funny and sweet. She's 13 years my junior but she's VERY mature. Stephanie and I have been dating ever since then and we moved in together five months ago. I'm really in love with Stephanie and she's 3 months pregnant now. I'm going to admit that ever since Jenny and I separated, we would occasionally spend the night together, have sex and sometimes discuss reconciling. Just like I'm in a relationship with Stephanie, Jenny has a boyfriend of her own. Now, Jennifer is sick of "playing games" with me, she told me if I want to give our marriage another chance she will dump her boyfriend Andrew and I'll have to dump Stephanie pregnant or not. Or else, she's staying with Andrew, I'm staying with Stephanie and we're getting a divorce. It's a hard decision, especially with all these children involved. I'm in love with Jenny, our marriage was wonderful and it was that ONE mistake with Rachel that ruined it all. Not to mention, Jenny and I have two amazing kids who misses having both their parents together. I love Rachel with all my heart and I always looked back and felt bad about the way I betrayed her in college. So I do feel as though I owe her for that. I always wondered what would have happened if I married her instead. She NEVER would have wound up with such a monster for a husband. The more I look at the precious baby girl I have with Rachel it breaks me down and I cry. But I'm VERY happy with Stephanie and I love her so much. She's giving me my fourth child and I'm giving her her first. I'm sure she knows that I still have feelings for my wife but she has NO that I'm still seeing Rachel but she does know about our child. I don't want to keep doing this. Whichever one I choose, the other two will be hurt. What would you do if you were me? Also, for all you racists out there, if you're assuming that I'm a black man, you're wrong.
Pregnancy - 16 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Wow
2 :
Get a vasectomy. Jeez.
3 :
ITS CALLED A CONDOM
4 :
i got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one. Also, for all you racists out there, if you're assuming that I'm a black man, you're right.
5 :
im speechless.
6 :
You should have stayed with your wife Jenny and not messed around with anyone else in the first place. Now you've made this mess. Why don't you let the women get together and decide what you should do
7 :
does your wife know you have cheated?
8 :
wear a condom...
9 :
The time to grow up was approx. 11 years ago when your first child was born. You made a commitment and you brought a child (and then another) into this world who want and expect and deserve two parents. It would be different if there were something irreparable happen in your marriage to make you separate but it was in fact your serial infidelity that caused it. Once you married and brought 2 other people into the relationship (your kids, not your girlfriends) you ceased to be the dating Cassanova that you once fancied yourself. It's time to take a hard look at yourself and who you've become and see if it is something you and your children can be truly proud of. Grow up, go home, and prepare for some hefty child support payments.
10 :
I sure hope you have a very good job.. cause I know that Child support is going to hurt something fierce.. Best to stay with Steph. Jenny will never fully recover from what you did to her. She might say she will, but if my husband left and then proceeded to get 2 different women pregnant then I could never trust him ever again. As for Rachel, your not in love with her, You just pity her and like getting sex from her every now and again. So it's best to stay with Steph and get your balls snipped.
11 :
wow. learn to settle downn..... with oneeee person
12 :
OMG! Is this a scene from Days of Our Lives or something? If not, you've got to be kidding me. You may, quite possibly, be the DUMBEST person alive. Not to mention completely full of yourself. I say, dump all 3 women, abandon you kids, and go eff yourself. You are all that you truly care about anyway. Why put anyone else through all the misery that is YOU! Booooo!!!
13 :
I think all those women should leave YOU alone! and poor kids.
14 :
Although I'm appalled and disgusted with your life, I would honestly like to try to answer you without condemnation. I want you to realize something about yourself. You will never be happy with one woman - that is how you are. You could choose any one of these women and believe yourself to have made the wrong decision in the future when one of life's curveballs comes into play. You have a void in your life that you are trying to fill with relationships. I'm not saying you won't find some happiness with one of them but it will never completely make you happy. Although this will sound crazy, the only way to fill that void in your life is with God. He is the absolute only thing that makes sense in this world of uncertainty and craziness. You might think no way, but I ask you to try it before your life becomes even more of a mess. After that, since Jenny is willing to get back with you and you still love her, I would recommend staying with her. She's the one you made vows to and she's the one that you should spend the rest of your life with. Of course, I would try to be in the lives of your other two children that you helped make but to make a true commitment to your wife, Jenny, to not ever be with the other two women ever again. Plus, I think you owe it to your children to be a good example to them as a father should be so they have an excellent chance of growing up to be the best adults they can be and that they can be true and committed to their future spouses as well.
15 :
First of all I think you should write a romance novel, and second of all I think that this is an extremely complicated situation that you REALLY need to think out thoroughly before you decide. I"m going to tell you my exact thoughts based off of what you have told me. 1. You should break it off with your wife. Reason: If she has someone else as well it means that she is willing to move on. I know you're worried about your kids but trust me, it would be better for you two to separate than to stay together. Your two children by Jenny would be better off growing up by split parents than ones that hold grudges against each other (and believe me, no matter how much you think everything would be all fine and dandy, there will always be that fight, always be that tension when you request to see your other children or to buy them something). Let her go, tell the kids that it's not their fault, and leave. 2. Tell Stephanie that you're seeing Rachel Reason: She will find out about it sooner or later and it's better to come from you than your ex or someone else. Also her reaction is key. If she still cares about you and is willing to forgive what you are doing, then go with it. Rachel to me, is just a "what if" situation. You want to be with her so much because of the fact that you want to know what would have happened if you stayed with her during college. The problem is, you are two different people now. What happened to her later in life was not at all your fault. You don't know if she changed at all just by spending that small amount of time with her. Let go of the fantasy of your old college fling. First love is not necessarily the last. 3.Make Stephanie know you care about her and that you want her to be apart of your life How: Take her out with your other kids and let them spend time with each other and let her know you want her apart of your other kids lives. Support her and your baby with her by just doing the simple things, such as going to her prenatal appointments. This is not a good time to stress her out, remember that. Do simple little things to show her you care, open the door for her, give her a rose, call her from work. Just be sweet and only ever think about her. If she suspects you with anyone else, nicely invite her to look through your phone or your facebook to put her mind at ease. I think you should choose Stephanie, and I hope it's not just a lust thing.
16 :
i think you need to break it off with all of them, so do the girls, because you have NO idea what you want, and who you want. 13 years is not mature, no matter what you think. just because she can spread her legs doesn't make her mature. i honestly don't think any of you are mature enough to have a relationship. i don't feel sorry for any of you, save for the kids that you're having and what they're going through. what would i do? i'd have kept it in my pants to begin with, and wouldn't have gotten married unless i was sure. your wife didn't rob her of anything, you made the choice. and to use that as an excuse is immature. if you didn't want to make the choice you shouldn't have cheated on her to begin with. it shouldn't be a hard decision if you know who you love, but with you being so fickle, you more than likely don't even know you're own name half the time. the other girl made her choice who to marry. she happened to marry a jerk. stuff happens. personally i think you all need to break it off, grow up, and stop being so selfish. pay your child support, but stop making new ones.
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Should I return to my wife, reconcile with my first love or commit to my current girlfriend?
Should I return to my wife, reconcile with my first love or commit to my current girlfriend?
I swear on everything that I'm not trolling. I am in love with my wife, my ex-girlfriend(first love) and my current girlfriend. I'm 40 years old and I feel like a stupid teenage boy for doing this to them because they are all amazing women. All of whom I have a child with or expecting a child with. So, I have to make a choice and I'd appreciate some advice and opinions. I met and fell in love with Rachel while we were in college and we dated steadily for over three years(1988-1991). I was just beginning to shed my "nerd" image after high school and Rachel became my first love when I got into college. We lost our virginity together and everything. During my fourth year in college in 1991, I had to spend four months in Europe studying abroad. Rachel and I had a big argument before I left for Europe but we didn't exactly breakup. While I was in Europe, I met Jenny. Although I've never seen her around campus, she was also studying abroad and she was attending the same college as Rachel and me. Jenny and I started studying together and then dating and then falling in love. The closer I got to Jenny, the farther apart I got from Rachel. When I returned to Florida, I told Rachel that I fell for someone else so we broke up and it broke her heart. Jenny and I stayed together, finished college, got married in 1996, had our daughter Tammi in 1999 and our son Damien in 2001. Jenny and I had a great marriage and I NEVER cheated until last year. Rachel and I reunited via Facebook in March 2009 through a mutual former classmate. She's divorced and she has a son around my kids' age; her ex-husband was an abusive jerk. Sparks started flying again, we met up in person and I proceeded to have an affair with Rachel while married to Jennifer. I still love Rachel but I had no plans on leaving Jenny. Rachel feels no remorse about dating me because she feels as though Jenny "robbed" her of what she could have had with me. True. In college, Jennifer did tell me to make a choice between her and Rachel and I chose Jennifer. So, I guess Rachel is still bitter after all these years. After two months of reconnecting with Rachel, Jenny found out about her. She was hurt and she told me to leave. So, I moved out in May 2009 but we still remained legally married. Although I continue to sleep with Rachel, I wasn't ready to commit myself to her because I was still sad about separating from Jenny. Even when Rachel got pregnant and gave birth to our daughter Destiny in April 2010, I still didn't commit. In July 2009, I met Stephanie. She was single, beautiful, smart, funny and sweet. She's 13 years my junior but she's VERY mature. Stephanie and I have been dating ever since then and we moved in together five months ago. I'm really in love with Stephanie and she's 3 months pregnant now. I'm going to admit that ever since Jenny and I separated, we would occasionally spend the night together, have sex and sometimes discuss reconciling. Just like I'm in a relationship with Stephanie, Jenny has a boyfriend of her own. Now, Jennifer is sick of "playing games" with me, she told me if I want to give our marriage another chance she will dump her boyfriend Andrew and I'll have to dump Stephanie pregnant or not. Or else, she's staying with Andrew, I'm staying with Stephanie and we're getting a divorce. It's a hard decision, especially with all these children involved. I'm in love with Jenny, our marriage was wonderful and it was that ONE mistake with Rachel that ruined it all. Not to mention, Jenny and I have two amazing kids who misses having both their parents together. I love Rachel with all my heart and I always looked back and felt bad about the way I betrayed her in college. So I do feel as though I owe her for that. I always wondered what would have happened if I married her instead. She NEVER would have wound up with such a monster for a husband. The more I look at the precious baby girl I have with Rachel it breaks me down and I cry. But I'm VERY happy with Stephanie and I love her so much. She's giving me my fourth child and I'm giving her her first. I'm sure she knows that I still have feelings for my wife but she has NO that I'm still seeing Rachel but she does know about our child. I don't want to keep doing this. Whichever one I choose, the other two will be hurt. What would you do if you were me?
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered - 7 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Wow you just ruined a whole bunch of kids lives! Grow up and be with 1 woman!
2 :
If I were you, I would go get castrated because you are just one sex-hungry moron.
3 :
That is a predicament that's for sure. As a woman, I have to say tsk tsk to you for lying to all these women. However, it seems that a few of them have been just as sneaky. Honestly, I believe you have a fear of commitment, while at the same time you are a people pleaser. Stop it. Let's get down to brass tax. Imagine your happiest memory. What are you doing? Or think of what you do while you're alone, like dancing or singing. What one of those women would play along with you and support you in whatever you do? Don't think about the kids. They are important, but if you choose a woman just because of the children, they will sense it. Don't you think those kids deserve to have a male figure around that actually loves everyone in their family as much as they deserve? Sometimes leaving is the most selfless thing you can do. It might be a good idea to see a counselor or a psychologist to try to work through some of your feelings. I wish you the best of luck. Please don't treat these women like schoolgirls anymore. "He loves me, he loves me not," is just not a healthy way to start any relationship.
4 :
I don't think I read all of it, I am pretty sure I just skipped to the end and was completely confused by the ending and decided that it wasn't worth reading all of it to figure out how it started. Seriously I think you are an idiot for asking people what baby-mama you should be with. Obviously any girl you can't be completely honest with isn't one you can have a complete relationship with. While you are still able to play all of them, no choice will feel like the right choice. And once you make a choice, you will have to hurt the others involved. You have to figure out what you can do to make the news less sh*ty, so that you can stay in the lives of all the children you've cast into the world. That's probably more important than what woman you choose.
5 :
The only one you actually committed to was Jenny, your wife. You married her and you have children by her. Honor that commitment and the one you owe to your children. You owe Rachel nothing... a wife trumps a former girlfriend. Say you are sorry and good bye. Stephanie... she is a fool if she got hooked up with you knowing any of this. Adopt her child and raise it as your own if both women will agree. Either way, she is history now. You do have a responsibility to your child. Get a vasectomy. And vasectomy or no, in the future keep it in your pants if you are not at home. I don't know why you posted this in the GLTB section but jeez... and they say gays are promiscuous! It's time you had a real heart to heart talk with the man in the mirror and realize you are a man now, and you can't keep flitting from flower to flower.
6 :
Seriously? Scedule a vasectomy tomorrow.
7 :
Stay with Jenny...you said it yourself your IN love with her. Rachel is just a fantasy...and liek other people have said Stephanie is an idiot...and your an idiot for getting Rachel pregnant and Stephanie pregnant not even a year later. good job.
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I swear on everything that I'm not trolling. I am in love with my wife, my ex-girlfriend(first love) and my current girlfriend. I'm 40 years old and I feel like a stupid teenage boy for doing this to them because they are all amazing women. All of whom I have a child with or expecting a child with. So, I have to make a choice and I'd appreciate some advice and opinions. I met and fell in love with Rachel while we were in college and we dated steadily for over three years(1988-1991). I was just beginning to shed my "nerd" image after high school and Rachel became my first love when I got into college. We lost our virginity together and everything. During my fourth year in college in 1991, I had to spend four months in Europe studying abroad. Rachel and I had a big argument before I left for Europe but we didn't exactly breakup. While I was in Europe, I met Jenny. Although I've never seen her around campus, she was also studying abroad and she was attending the same college as Rachel and me. Jenny and I started studying together and then dating and then falling in love. The closer I got to Jenny, the farther apart I got from Rachel. When I returned to Florida, I told Rachel that I fell for someone else so we broke up and it broke her heart. Jenny and I stayed together, finished college, got married in 1996, had our daughter Tammi in 1999 and our son Damien in 2001. Jenny and I had a great marriage and I NEVER cheated until last year. Rachel and I reunited via Facebook in March 2009 through a mutual former classmate. She's divorced and she has a son around my kids' age; her ex-husband was an abusive jerk. Sparks started flying again, we met up in person and I proceeded to have an affair with Rachel while married to Jennifer. I still love Rachel but I had no plans on leaving Jenny. Rachel feels no remorse about dating me because she feels as though Jenny "robbed" her of what she could have had with me. True. In college, Jennifer did tell me to make a choice between her and Rachel and I chose Jennifer. So, I guess Rachel is still bitter after all these years. After two months of reconnecting with Rachel, Jenny found out about her. She was hurt and she told me to leave. So, I moved out in May 2009 but we still remained legally married. Although I continue to sleep with Rachel, I wasn't ready to commit myself to her because I was still sad about separating from Jenny. Even when Rachel got pregnant and gave birth to our daughter Destiny in April 2010, I still didn't commit. In July 2009, I met Stephanie. She was single, beautiful, smart, funny and sweet. She's 13 years my junior but she's VERY mature. Stephanie and I have been dating ever since then and we moved in together five months ago. I'm really in love with Stephanie and she's 3 months pregnant now. I'm going to admit that ever since Jenny and I separated, we would occasionally spend the night together, have sex and sometimes discuss reconciling. Just like I'm in a relationship with Stephanie, Jenny has a boyfriend of her own. Now, Jennifer is sick of "playing games" with me, she told me if I want to give our marriage another chance she will dump her boyfriend Andrew and I'll have to dump Stephanie pregnant or not. Or else, she's staying with Andrew, I'm staying with Stephanie and we're getting a divorce. It's a hard decision, especially with all these children involved. I'm in love with Jenny, our marriage was wonderful and it was that ONE mistake with Rachel that ruined it all. Not to mention, Jenny and I have two amazing kids who misses having both their parents together. I love Rachel with all my heart and I always looked back and felt bad about the way I betrayed her in college. So I do feel as though I owe her for that. I always wondered what would have happened if I married her instead. She NEVER would have wound up with such a monster for a husband. The more I look at the precious baby girl I have with Rachel it breaks me down and I cry. But I'm VERY happy with Stephanie and I love her so much. She's giving me my fourth child and I'm giving her her first. I'm sure she knows that I still have feelings for my wife but she has NO that I'm still seeing Rachel but she does know about our child. I don't want to keep doing this. Whichever one I choose, the other two will be hurt. What would you do if you were me?
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered - 7 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Wow you just ruined a whole bunch of kids lives! Grow up and be with 1 woman!
2 :
If I were you, I would go get castrated because you are just one sex-hungry moron.
3 :
That is a predicament that's for sure. As a woman, I have to say tsk tsk to you for lying to all these women. However, it seems that a few of them have been just as sneaky. Honestly, I believe you have a fear of commitment, while at the same time you are a people pleaser. Stop it. Let's get down to brass tax. Imagine your happiest memory. What are you doing? Or think of what you do while you're alone, like dancing or singing. What one of those women would play along with you and support you in whatever you do? Don't think about the kids. They are important, but if you choose a woman just because of the children, they will sense it. Don't you think those kids deserve to have a male figure around that actually loves everyone in their family as much as they deserve? Sometimes leaving is the most selfless thing you can do. It might be a good idea to see a counselor or a psychologist to try to work through some of your feelings. I wish you the best of luck. Please don't treat these women like schoolgirls anymore. "He loves me, he loves me not," is just not a healthy way to start any relationship.
4 :
I don't think I read all of it, I am pretty sure I just skipped to the end and was completely confused by the ending and decided that it wasn't worth reading all of it to figure out how it started. Seriously I think you are an idiot for asking people what baby-mama you should be with. Obviously any girl you can't be completely honest with isn't one you can have a complete relationship with. While you are still able to play all of them, no choice will feel like the right choice. And once you make a choice, you will have to hurt the others involved. You have to figure out what you can do to make the news less sh*ty, so that you can stay in the lives of all the children you've cast into the world. That's probably more important than what woman you choose.
5 :
The only one you actually committed to was Jenny, your wife. You married her and you have children by her. Honor that commitment and the one you owe to your children. You owe Rachel nothing... a wife trumps a former girlfriend. Say you are sorry and good bye. Stephanie... she is a fool if she got hooked up with you knowing any of this. Adopt her child and raise it as your own if both women will agree. Either way, she is history now. You do have a responsibility to your child. Get a vasectomy. And vasectomy or no, in the future keep it in your pants if you are not at home. I don't know why you posted this in the GLTB section but jeez... and they say gays are promiscuous! It's time you had a real heart to heart talk with the man in the mirror and realize you are a man now, and you can't keep flitting from flower to flower.
6 :
Seriously? Scedule a vasectomy tomorrow.
7 :
Stay with Jenny...you said it yourself your IN love with her. Rachel is just a fantasy...and liek other people have said Stephanie is an idiot...and your an idiot for getting Rachel pregnant and Stephanie pregnant not even a year later. good job.
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Is it hard to find a new best friend in a new high school?
Is it hard to find a new best friend in a new high school?
I moved states (From Florida to Washington!) For the moment I'm being home schooled so I can start school next year. I've been feeling REALLY really lonely :( I have nobody and I'm getting sick of my family being the only people I see everyday. I really long for a bestfriend, I have certain qualities that my old BFF had that I would like to find in a new one. But I've known her since we were 10, I checked her facebook just now, she's long gone and has forgotten about me because of a fight we had, I feel really guilty, it was all my fault and I deeply regret everything. But now that I'm starting new I was wondering how hard would it be in high school to find a life best friend with all the qualities I want (they're not a while lot, just that she has to like animals a whole lot, to be sensitive and caring one who no matter what won't ditch me) I have no trouble making friends, I'm pretty eccentric have many cool things to discuss, I'm very confident etc. But I'm not looking for someone to call every now and then, I'm looking for someone's shoulder to lie on. Please help, I'm so lonely it's making me sick.
Friends - 2 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I'm from Wa too :) Well, when you go to school, I think you will have no problem making new friends. Just be selective and make sure they have good qualities like yourself. I know that loneliness can be so over whelming..
2 :
Finding friends shouldn't be too difficult. Be yourself and see what will happen.
Read more other entries :
I moved states (From Florida to Washington!) For the moment I'm being home schooled so I can start school next year. I've been feeling REALLY really lonely :( I have nobody and I'm getting sick of my family being the only people I see everyday. I really long for a bestfriend, I have certain qualities that my old BFF had that I would like to find in a new one. But I've known her since we were 10, I checked her facebook just now, she's long gone and has forgotten about me because of a fight we had, I feel really guilty, it was all my fault and I deeply regret everything. But now that I'm starting new I was wondering how hard would it be in high school to find a life best friend with all the qualities I want (they're not a while lot, just that she has to like animals a whole lot, to be sensitive and caring one who no matter what won't ditch me) I have no trouble making friends, I'm pretty eccentric have many cool things to discuss, I'm very confident etc. But I'm not looking for someone to call every now and then, I'm looking for someone's shoulder to lie on. Please help, I'm so lonely it's making me sick.
Friends - 2 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I'm from Wa too :) Well, when you go to school, I think you will have no problem making new friends. Just be selective and make sure they have good qualities like yourself. I know that loneliness can be so over whelming..
2 :
Finding friends shouldn't be too difficult. Be yourself and see what will happen.
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