Help Getting My Ex-GF. Broke up 5 Months Ago.. Now Talking Again.. Complicated Though..?
I was a jerk.. i've worked on a lot on the time that she and I broke up.. We broke up 5 months ago we stopped talking after because she blocked me off ..I worked on myself. She was hurt because I was selfish, rude, controlling, jealous and a jerk. I never laid my hands on her or anything like that but I had a short temper.. I still have my temper but I have my control of it.. we split up.. she didn't want to talk to me or anything. Last month (December) she sent me a message on facebook. We're still befriended on facebook. She calls me, but she calls me private as she also changed her phone number after the bad break up because I was really trying to fix the relationship. (When she calls its private and she calls almost every night and falls asleep on the phone like we used to do when we were together). We talk now but I guess it's under her terms. I've told her I still love her and she has told me she does to but she barely tells me how she really feels. I do want her back but I don't know what to do to show her that I have changed. We were supposed to actually go to Church on Sunday and have breakfast after but the bad luck... I caught a stomach virus Saturday night going into Sunday.. I couldn't see her, we rescheduled for this weekend but she said she has plans after Church. What can I do? On AOL messenger she and I were discussing things then we got into a little discussion.. I later told her that I was trying to make her happy again..she said "yeah too little too late...you need to try harder".. I answered "I'm trying to but how can I if you don't let me, I mean how can I walk through a doorway if the door is closed" she said use that analogy and FIND A KEY..What can I do to fix this situation? How can I get her back? What did she really mean by that? It's kind of hard to understand because I really love her and was happy with her until I acted up we both stopped being happy and I don't plan to repeat that EVER again. I learned from my mistakes. I am 20 and she is 19. But I am into that commitment stuff... I always was ever since I saw Chandler and Monica in Friends. Years back. I wanted just that. I was hurt too many times which is why I had trust issues and can be insecure which is what damaged this relationship. And to the others THANKS! but how can I do all these things? We haven't seen each other.. I can't text her because I don't have her number we just sometimes talk through AIM and when she calls me. I try to kinda make her tell me that she loves me by telling her that I love her but she says "I know you do". And she doesnt want me to push her to tell me because then she will stop talking to me again and I was really close of falling off the edge because she said I was pushing her.. I don't know if she is gonna but I was really just venting to her because we were always there for each other and I told her how I felt about everything and she said I was pushing her.. She doesn't want to give me her number because she says not yet.. "we're not friends" I think she's playing hard to get.. But if we're not friends then we wouldn't speak.. She just doesn't want to admit it. HELP!!
Other - Family & Relationships - 4 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
no one going to answer this question. just saying.
2 :
mikeofny you are getting what you deserve. when you be mean to some one especially a woman you need all the hurt you can get because there are too many guys like you running around never getting pay back. so you have to take what she is dishing out until she decides what she want to do with you. the problem is that she does not trust you and until she feels like she can you will only get what you are getting and you can not make her take you back until she feels like it she is hurting and that is because at one time she cared a lot or even loved you a lot and by you being the things that you said you were and doing what you did you hurt her. if she do come back to you it will never be the same again. and if you have a short temper are you sure that you are in TOTAL control of it? if not you can mess up again. so i would suggest that when you talk to her be calm and do not try to make her say anything or what you want her to say because that in itself is controlling. she is her own person and you can see from what she did and how she is controlling her feelings you can not make her do anything that she do not want to do. it might take some time for you to get her back but in the meantime you should keep working on yourself because if she comes back to you you will have to be a completely new you. and if she choose to just be friends value her friendship and then you maybe able to work from there and get her back because through friendship she can see if you have changed. and if you, love her and miss her don't force anything you say this is hard work yes it is but you made it hard, so go to work
3 :
You're being way too impatient. If she gets a hint of this impatience you will scare her away. She is treading very slowly & carefully to see how it could develop and to see if you really have changed or if you just think you have or if you're just saying it to get her back. It is normal for her to be wary & hesitant and take her time to see if she can actually trust you. Unless you want to scare her away, you have to accept this completely & just go with the contact she wants for now if you want to keep it open. Stop dwelling on it & winding your mind up as she'll pick up on it.
4 :
Mike your going to half to slow down my friend, do not keep after her to get back with you, for all you will do is make things a little harder for her to believe what you tell her. I no you may want her back, but you have got to let her be the one to say the three words you want to hear, I Love You. So for starters stop telling her you do, then she may wonder why you haven. Let her no she has all the time in the World to decide on you two.And keep proving to her you have change from what you used to be. If she tells you she has got other plans do not let it get to you, but in stead say something like Oh that's okay just let me no when your free.This will make her think, about you saying you have change, You have just got to show her you have. There are things in a girl life thy that Love and that's to be treated like a woman and that you Trust them, this comes before Love for with out the Trust you never will have Love. Good Luck
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Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Why doesn't Obama talk about how globalization has ruined the middle class?
Why doesn't Obama talk about how globalization has ruined the middle class?
It is an age old plan. But it has worked for years. Make sure all we talk about are divisive issues that divide us according to our culture or religious beliefs or skin color or ethnicity. This is done to keep us from focusing on what is happening in this country. THE ONLY ISSUE worth discussing is that we are being taken over by multinational corporations that wish to convert this country into little more than an outsourcing service center, serviced alone by fast-food chains, stores like Wal-mart and ignorant, cheap labor. And thanks to globalization, they have largely succeeded. The machine that has grown up to keep us from discussing this horrible truth is the cable news channel. Day after day, supposed liberals like Olbermann, Mathews, and Maddow TAKE THE BATE (from supposed conservatives like Hannity and Beck) and participate in endless, pointless discussions with their $1000-an-appearance-guests about how there are no death panels, about how Obama is not a racist and about how CRAZY that kooky Sarah Palin is. And can you believe they STILL think Obama’s not American? And hey, what about that crazy new Arizona immigration law? Politicians who have become little more than robots for the super rich have aided in this demonic plan of distraction and have helped to drive the mainstream media into chasing one distracting issue after another. It is not enough that these sold-out-politicians are daily sponsoring laws that give multinational corporations even more power over the average worker. They also keep the distraction machine going by stating one audacious lie after another into the cable news echo chamber. All we need is some off-the-wall comment by Michele Bachmann or some facebook tweet from Palin or an offensive comment by Limbaugh or some racist Tea Party rally and we are off to the races. Another day goes by and we are only more divided. Another day goes by and we didn’t mention Globalization at all. Mission accomplished! Today we are made to discuss the claims that we have a socialist in the White House; tomorrow we are made to discuss bigots who seek to circumvent the American tradition of the freedom of religion. Oh and did you hear that Beck and Palin gave a speech on the Lincoln Memorial to commemorate MLK!? The gall of those idiots! Oh, and let us not forget the whole Quran-burning insanity. On a conveyor belt of sorts, the distractions keep coming and they never cease. I propose that we stop allowing ourselves to be conned into discussing these non-issues. We’ve got to sound the REAL alarm instead of wasting our time debunking all the fake ones. The most urgent and alarming fact we should be stating every time one of these fake issues gets raised is: Globalization has completely destroyed our middle class!! Period, end of story. It is the proverbial 1000-pound gorilla in the room that nobody in public life is acknowledging. If Obama wants an issue upon which to win a second term, not to mention the midterms, it is right here staring at him in the face. The unemployment rate is all the proof we need that action must be taken NOW. Countries who’ve been protecting their labor with tariffs are doing much better right now than we are even in these hard economic times. It’s just that simple. Look at China! Will Obama wake up and seize the moment? Or is he really just the new outsourcing-branch-manager-in-chief? http://www.hatingitmagazine.com/2010/09/10/a-hating-it-game-of-distraction/ hey Reagan-Jeffersonian Party Member, why don't you wake up! If we had all the manufacturing jobs that we lost from Globalization here right now, we wouldn't be at almost 10% unemployment. hey iconoclast60, don't give me that. Multi-national corporations hate paying fare wages, so they bought the gov't and forced it to get rid of our tariffs, just to circumvent union efforts to protect US worker rights. And your ignorance only aids these greedy bastards in their neofeudalistic designs. oops, I meant "fair" wages!
Politics - 9 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
As Obama was voted in by the majority of voters, I don't imagine that it is him that is doing the dividing
2 :
I think he favors globalization, as do most progressives, more that he worries about the trials of the middle class.
3 :
You can't stop the world from turning. America believes in the capital markets that
4 :
He wants to get elceted for another term
5 :
Because globalisation if it exists at all is a bunch of bull.
6 :
We all know this bud. Neither party is going to help so what would you like to do? State government is completely bought out they make the national leadership look clean. So you want to what start a email campaign a C-SPAN call in campaign? Obama is going to have to be reelected I don't hold any hope out for much changing until he is a lame duck and can do what needs doing without worrying about an election.
7 :
Obama is not man enough to do it. There is probably only one person that has the balls to do it. They call him a crazy old man. I think we all know who it is. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QbOzUQm1ms0
8 :
It hasnt. Imagine if we cut off major markets like India. Our production would plummet, along with jobs.
9 :
Your post sounds like a pep rally speech at a union convention. I blame unions not corporations for our woes. Unions killed the maritime business and the auto industry.
Read more other entries :
It is an age old plan. But it has worked for years. Make sure all we talk about are divisive issues that divide us according to our culture or religious beliefs or skin color or ethnicity. This is done to keep us from focusing on what is happening in this country. THE ONLY ISSUE worth discussing is that we are being taken over by multinational corporations that wish to convert this country into little more than an outsourcing service center, serviced alone by fast-food chains, stores like Wal-mart and ignorant, cheap labor. And thanks to globalization, they have largely succeeded. The machine that has grown up to keep us from discussing this horrible truth is the cable news channel. Day after day, supposed liberals like Olbermann, Mathews, and Maddow TAKE THE BATE (from supposed conservatives like Hannity and Beck) and participate in endless, pointless discussions with their $1000-an-appearance-guests about how there are no death panels, about how Obama is not a racist and about how CRAZY that kooky Sarah Palin is. And can you believe they STILL think Obama’s not American? And hey, what about that crazy new Arizona immigration law? Politicians who have become little more than robots for the super rich have aided in this demonic plan of distraction and have helped to drive the mainstream media into chasing one distracting issue after another. It is not enough that these sold-out-politicians are daily sponsoring laws that give multinational corporations even more power over the average worker. They also keep the distraction machine going by stating one audacious lie after another into the cable news echo chamber. All we need is some off-the-wall comment by Michele Bachmann or some facebook tweet from Palin or an offensive comment by Limbaugh or some racist Tea Party rally and we are off to the races. Another day goes by and we are only more divided. Another day goes by and we didn’t mention Globalization at all. Mission accomplished! Today we are made to discuss the claims that we have a socialist in the White House; tomorrow we are made to discuss bigots who seek to circumvent the American tradition of the freedom of religion. Oh and did you hear that Beck and Palin gave a speech on the Lincoln Memorial to commemorate MLK!? The gall of those idiots! Oh, and let us not forget the whole Quran-burning insanity. On a conveyor belt of sorts, the distractions keep coming and they never cease. I propose that we stop allowing ourselves to be conned into discussing these non-issues. We’ve got to sound the REAL alarm instead of wasting our time debunking all the fake ones. The most urgent and alarming fact we should be stating every time one of these fake issues gets raised is: Globalization has completely destroyed our middle class!! Period, end of story. It is the proverbial 1000-pound gorilla in the room that nobody in public life is acknowledging. If Obama wants an issue upon which to win a second term, not to mention the midterms, it is right here staring at him in the face. The unemployment rate is all the proof we need that action must be taken NOW. Countries who’ve been protecting their labor with tariffs are doing much better right now than we are even in these hard economic times. It’s just that simple. Look at China! Will Obama wake up and seize the moment? Or is he really just the new outsourcing-branch-manager-in-chief? http://www.hatingitmagazine.com/2010/09/10/a-hating-it-game-of-distraction/ hey Reagan-Jeffersonian Party Member, why don't you wake up! If we had all the manufacturing jobs that we lost from Globalization here right now, we wouldn't be at almost 10% unemployment. hey iconoclast60, don't give me that. Multi-national corporations hate paying fare wages, so they bought the gov't and forced it to get rid of our tariffs, just to circumvent union efforts to protect US worker rights. And your ignorance only aids these greedy bastards in their neofeudalistic designs. oops, I meant "fair" wages!
Politics - 9 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
As Obama was voted in by the majority of voters, I don't imagine that it is him that is doing the dividing
2 :
I think he favors globalization, as do most progressives, more that he worries about the trials of the middle class.
3 :
You can't stop the world from turning. America believes in the capital markets that
4 :
He wants to get elceted for another term
5 :
Because globalisation if it exists at all is a bunch of bull.
6 :
We all know this bud. Neither party is going to help so what would you like to do? State government is completely bought out they make the national leadership look clean. So you want to what start a email campaign a C-SPAN call in campaign? Obama is going to have to be reelected I don't hold any hope out for much changing until he is a lame duck and can do what needs doing without worrying about an election.
7 :
Obama is not man enough to do it. There is probably only one person that has the balls to do it. They call him a crazy old man. I think we all know who it is. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QbOzUQm1ms0
8 :
It hasnt. Imagine if we cut off major markets like India. Our production would plummet, along with jobs.
9 :
Your post sounds like a pep rally speech at a union convention. I blame unions not corporations for our woes. Unions killed the maritime business and the auto industry.
Read more other entries :
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
What do you think of this story?
What do you think of this story?
 Savannah and her friends emerged to the Glendale Mall examining mannequins in the display windows. Carter and the other boys had wondered off to wherever they went to. It was just Savannah and the girls. Savannah had discussed song ideas to Palma on the way to the mall. Palma suggested that they should sing some of Savannah's personal songs, but Savannah politely refused. She was too awkward to belt out the lyrics from her sappy love songs. After a few begs and pleads from Palma, she finally gave in. "Okay, maybe." Savannah said noncommittally. "I'm not making any promises." "That's good enough." responded Palma. A few teenagers from Savannah's school stopped to stare at Savannah and Palma as if they were celebrities. Holly, Elisha, and Reese just simply ignored the girls as they walked into Wet Seal. Savannah didn't know how they did it. Why was it that her and Palma were the only girls who got excited when people noticed them? Were they so unaccustomed to popularity that they had to smile every time someone looked up to them. Savannah remembered that Ghazal girl she had met at the football game the other night. She was so nice to Savannah that she had thought it was a joke. As if Ghazal was just pulling her leg. But it was real. Savannah was like an idol to her. She was flattered by Ghazal's fascination with her. In the store, dresses and thin shirts displayed on the clearance rack while the new and fresh winter clothes displayed at the front of the store. Immediately, an Irish-green, cable-knit sweater with navy pinstriped sleeves and collar caught her attention. It was absolutely beautiful. Walking up to it, she traced her fingers on the soft fabric. Suddenly her eyes grew wide with disappointment. Forty Dollars. She only had twenty-five dollars in her pocket and a few change. "Great." she grumbled. Walking around the store, she found more tops that were in her price range. But she only had enough money for one or two tops. She finally settled on a black, purple, and navy sweater-vest and two pairs of fleecy underwear. Reese walked up to her with piles of clothes in her hand. Her hair was disheveled from when she had jogged that morning and her caramel eyes were flashing with delight. "Hey!" she trilled, putting her clothes next to Savannah. "Is that all you're buying?" "I don't have enough money." Reese scoffed, walking back to the place where Savannah had idolized the green top. She simply plucked the top off of its rack and brought it back to her. Savannah just shook her head. She didn't want her friends to buy this stuff for her. Who did they think they were? Bill Gates? Just buying each other all kinds of gifts like Santa Clause passing out candy canes? It was insane. It was unconventional. It was high school teenagers who were privileged in small town Indiana. It was December 1 with Christmas just around the corner. Savannah guessed she could consider Reese's token as an early Christmas gift.  When the lady handed the bag back to her, she gave Savannah a knowing smile. She probably wished she had a friend to buy her things whenever she felt like it. Outside of the mall, Holly and Elisha were both chattering away on their phones. Deciding to check her Facebook, Savannah snatched her cellphone from her bag. She flipped through her Favorites before clicking on the Facebook logo. At the speed of light, the website popped up with her email and password saved into the site's login. Usually, there were about a dozen of new messages from her usual friends, but there were only a couple of them. Then suddenly, her eyes traveled towards a topic that made her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. On Andy's wall, it featuring him and Heather Gleason talking. Heather had posted an early message from Andy on his wall. Heather Gleason: Competition: Mud Wrestling Holly Vrs. Lettie Place: Andy's basement Time: 5:45 August 14 Andy Simms: haha good times Savannah laughed. It was probably just a humorous inside joke. But just to be on the safe side she asked Holly about it. Holly laughed so loud that people stopped to see where the noise was coming from. "Oh, yeah!" Elisha grinned. "I remember that day. The whole floor was messy." Savannah gawked at them. What they were telling her was bizarre. Holly and Lettie actually did things like that? Savannah wondered what other weird and perverse things her friends did. She shook her head, chuckling to herself.  By four o'clock, they were at Holly's house. Savannah stood on the platform in Holly's basement with microphone gripped to her hand. She and Palma needed to practice for singing competition the school was having in a couple of weeks. The first song they were singing was "Just Be Good To Me" by SOS Band. "Friends...!" belted Savannah as the instrumental version song
Books & Authors - 1 Answers
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1 :
thats reallly good. keep on writing. (: and can you answer mine please? ; http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Au1tzMDKsybTmIRJV_lR1t3sy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20100414184630AA4mn9y
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 Savannah and her friends emerged to the Glendale Mall examining mannequins in the display windows. Carter and the other boys had wondered off to wherever they went to. It was just Savannah and the girls. Savannah had discussed song ideas to Palma on the way to the mall. Palma suggested that they should sing some of Savannah's personal songs, but Savannah politely refused. She was too awkward to belt out the lyrics from her sappy love songs. After a few begs and pleads from Palma, she finally gave in. "Okay, maybe." Savannah said noncommittally. "I'm not making any promises." "That's good enough." responded Palma. A few teenagers from Savannah's school stopped to stare at Savannah and Palma as if they were celebrities. Holly, Elisha, and Reese just simply ignored the girls as they walked into Wet Seal. Savannah didn't know how they did it. Why was it that her and Palma were the only girls who got excited when people noticed them? Were they so unaccustomed to popularity that they had to smile every time someone looked up to them. Savannah remembered that Ghazal girl she had met at the football game the other night. She was so nice to Savannah that she had thought it was a joke. As if Ghazal was just pulling her leg. But it was real. Savannah was like an idol to her. She was flattered by Ghazal's fascination with her. In the store, dresses and thin shirts displayed on the clearance rack while the new and fresh winter clothes displayed at the front of the store. Immediately, an Irish-green, cable-knit sweater with navy pinstriped sleeves and collar caught her attention. It was absolutely beautiful. Walking up to it, she traced her fingers on the soft fabric. Suddenly her eyes grew wide with disappointment. Forty Dollars. She only had twenty-five dollars in her pocket and a few change. "Great." she grumbled. Walking around the store, she found more tops that were in her price range. But she only had enough money for one or two tops. She finally settled on a black, purple, and navy sweater-vest and two pairs of fleecy underwear. Reese walked up to her with piles of clothes in her hand. Her hair was disheveled from when she had jogged that morning and her caramel eyes were flashing with delight. "Hey!" she trilled, putting her clothes next to Savannah. "Is that all you're buying?" "I don't have enough money." Reese scoffed, walking back to the place where Savannah had idolized the green top. She simply plucked the top off of its rack and brought it back to her. Savannah just shook her head. She didn't want her friends to buy this stuff for her. Who did they think they were? Bill Gates? Just buying each other all kinds of gifts like Santa Clause passing out candy canes? It was insane. It was unconventional. It was high school teenagers who were privileged in small town Indiana. It was December 1 with Christmas just around the corner. Savannah guessed she could consider Reese's token as an early Christmas gift.  When the lady handed the bag back to her, she gave Savannah a knowing smile. She probably wished she had a friend to buy her things whenever she felt like it. Outside of the mall, Holly and Elisha were both chattering away on their phones. Deciding to check her Facebook, Savannah snatched her cellphone from her bag. She flipped through her Favorites before clicking on the Facebook logo. At the speed of light, the website popped up with her email and password saved into the site's login. Usually, there were about a dozen of new messages from her usual friends, but there were only a couple of them. Then suddenly, her eyes traveled towards a topic that made her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. On Andy's wall, it featuring him and Heather Gleason talking. Heather had posted an early message from Andy on his wall. Heather Gleason: Competition: Mud Wrestling Holly Vrs. Lettie Place: Andy's basement Time: 5:45 August 14 Andy Simms: haha good times Savannah laughed. It was probably just a humorous inside joke. But just to be on the safe side she asked Holly about it. Holly laughed so loud that people stopped to see where the noise was coming from. "Oh, yeah!" Elisha grinned. "I remember that day. The whole floor was messy." Savannah gawked at them. What they were telling her was bizarre. Holly and Lettie actually did things like that? Savannah wondered what other weird and perverse things her friends did. She shook her head, chuckling to herself.  By four o'clock, they were at Holly's house. Savannah stood on the platform in Holly's basement with microphone gripped to her hand. She and Palma needed to practice for singing competition the school was having in a couple of weeks. The first song they were singing was "Just Be Good To Me" by SOS Band. "Friends...!" belted Savannah as the instrumental version song
Books & Authors - 1 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
thats reallly good. keep on writing. (: and can you answer mine please? ; http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Au1tzMDKsybTmIRJV_lR1t3sy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20100414184630AA4mn9y
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Thursday, November 1, 2012
3 years, one baby, no ring?
3 years, one baby, no ring?
Friday will be my 3 year anniversary. We have a 18 month old together (yes, things happen, please don't dwell on that fact) live together, etc. No proposal...even though he promised he would. Last fall after ordering some golf clubs off ebay, he ordered me a ring, too...it cost 13 dollars, well below even a $90 club and $80 dollar jersey he had just ordered. When we were discussing marriage, I told him the ring was not important (it isn't). The thing is, this ring was costume jewelry. So fake I couldn't even pull it off until I got a new one. It was huge and plastic, and he didn't propose, just handed me the envelope when it came in the mail. He acted totally hurt that I was hurt and promised to get me a new one. Well, last month, while having a check for over $4,000, he buys a brand new Xbox and games...pawning the Xbox I bought him for our anniversary 2 years prior. I finally asked, and he said he had no money for a ring. (I had a $200 Wal-Mart ring picked out..). Then, this weekend, I wake up and he has missed messages on his phone. I checked them, because our son was with his aunt. (Ok, and sometimes it's another woman). I just checked to see WHO they were from...and it was another woman..so I read it. It said "Hey" then another "Hey. What are you doing? I'm just sitting here alone in my bedroom, bored....I knew he said he met her in class, I checked, not in class. That is what he told me when I asked, then he admitted that he met her after class while "hanging out" and asked her for her number for "unknown reasons" just came out before he knew it. He had just answered her texts to "be polite" and erased them so I wouldn't be mad. (He was texting her while I was in class). Unfortunately, this is about the 5th woman. I have a list of names. I've found dating websites, messages on myspace/facebook, etc. He told me he needed a "break" and that after his break we could get back together. Ok, so, what does this even mean? Obviously, this guy has no intention of marrying me right? No ring, no proposal, no anniversary plans/gifts (I usually get a mutually liked dvd for special occasions) and a new girls number. I love him though, and I try to think maybe I am too overbearing? Maybe it is because I did not lose the weight he wanted me to? Should I just give up on this now? Yeah, I wasn't mad about the Xbox. Just that he pawned the one I gave him, and had enough money for both items! What he pawned it for could have at least gone toward the ring. Also, he put me into the mind of marriage, as he brought it up, then poof! It was gone. So it makes me think. Also, I bought all of the boy's winter clothes, new toys, etc, so it wasn't that he didn't have money because he spent so much on our son. I should graduate in May with bachelors and associate degrees. He just started school. I think I am also seeing the pattern! lol
Marriage & Divorce - 13 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
yes. you should give up on this now. You have a little boy on your hands who is impulsive to buy boy games as well as looking elsewhere while leaving you hanging. And yes, the ring is important. Don't ever say it isn't again. You know what guys do with that information now don't you? It tells them you're not that important, that you cheap and that you'll wait and wait and wait......Stop waiting. Raise your standards. And never apologize for it.
2 :
You've been with he guy 3 yrs, he's stepping out on you, he spends money on toys when that's probably not the best way spend it if he's got a partner and a child to help support...he doesn't sound ready for marriage or responsible enough, so why are you still wasting time with him??? You can't force someone to be ready to marry and the kid was bad timing indeed but you can't send it back...he can pay you support and not be married to you, and from what you describe he's not someone you'd be happy married to anyway...set him free to sow his oats...
3 :
I don't know why you are waiting for him. If you want to be married, say so.Put a time frame on it and let him know what you expect. You are a grown woman who is a mother. It's time to direct your own life rather than wait on him. Don't have any more babies with boyfriends. Marriage is a goal of yours. Put your priorities straight.
4 :
Babies are expensive. Maybe he can't afford one after buying diapers, baby wipes, formula plus feeding a family. I wandered in the baby section to get some diapers for a friend's daughter and other baby things and was shocked at the prices since my son was a baby! Thank God that was 27 years ago since I had to get diapers for him!
5 :
Honey, an engagement ring should cost a guy roughly 3 month's pay. So, yeah, IT IS important. I would say that the most important thing to your guy is HIM, not you, not your baby, but HIM. This will not likely change - EVER. You have some tough decisions to make, choose wisely.
6 :
Honey I am sorry, but if marriage is what you want this isn't your guy. Trust me if it was his priority, he would have spent the cash on a ring for you - and not all the toys. This is a take it or leave it situation. Take a look at your life with him, and see if you are willing to accept it as-is. With no other expectations, hopes, etc. If you love him enough to stay then stay without expecting anything. After two years of being together unmarried, couples that marry after two years have a significant jump in divorce rates. Basically because of the expectations brought on by marriage and what roles the man and woman play. So if its something you want, embrace it. If not then start moving towards getting on with your life without him. You know he is up to no good. Let's hope he isn't sleeping around for your health's sake. You sound very smart and I am sure can figure this one out.
7 :
He has an established history of cheating (or at least trying), he blows the family budget on toys for himself, and yet you think this is somehow justified because you haven't lost all of the weight you put on bearing his kid? Honey, please listen to yourself. Then call his bluff and take the "break," but tell him you'll be the one letting him know whether you want to put up with his nonsense any longer. I can almost guarantee you he'll panic. Just don't take him back unless you see sincere evidence of long-term change.
8 :
I would of said no if it was just the Xbox and stuff because thats most men. But the other women is just too much, drop that boiii and live your life because you deserve to find your own beautiful husband that understands you :) good luck
9 :
i know you love him...but please let go of him...please...he is disrespecting you in a major way and you will be disrespecting yourself if you go along with his B.S....just look how many women have answered and said let go
10 :
Absolutely he has NO intentions.. you are his comfort zone. Hey, no ring... no marriage... no commitment. You and your child deserve better. You need a committed man who loves you and want to spend the rest of his life with you (and you alone) and your child needs a father who not only loves him but is committed to his mother. Be praying for you.
11 :
A lot of good advice here. This is a tale as old as time. What you have here is a selfish man. Your love will not change him. You are not responsible for what he does; it's not the weight you didn't lose, it's the man himself. He is cheating on you. He doesn't care to marry you because he feels that he is still single and also that you can be bought off with cheap trinkets and lies. Before that baby is old enough to truly remember him, replace that selfish man with a good man. Three quarters of the men out there are good and loving husbands and fathers; get you one of those. Then your precious child will grow up loving a man who is worth it. Women have met this sort of man for thousands and thousands of years. You are not the only one who has suffered like this. Find the man who loves you for you, who eagerly asks for your hand in marriage, and who feels lucky if you say "yes."
12 :
"Obviously, this guy has no intention of marrying me right?" Right. "Should I just give up on this now?" Yes.
13 :
He has no intentions of ever marrying you, and you should consider yourself lucky. Why in the name of all that is sane would you want to spend your life with someone who is immature, irresponsible, dishonest AND cheats on you into the bargain? Stop wasting your time already.
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Friday will be my 3 year anniversary. We have a 18 month old together (yes, things happen, please don't dwell on that fact) live together, etc. No proposal...even though he promised he would. Last fall after ordering some golf clubs off ebay, he ordered me a ring, too...it cost 13 dollars, well below even a $90 club and $80 dollar jersey he had just ordered. When we were discussing marriage, I told him the ring was not important (it isn't). The thing is, this ring was costume jewelry. So fake I couldn't even pull it off until I got a new one. It was huge and plastic, and he didn't propose, just handed me the envelope when it came in the mail. He acted totally hurt that I was hurt and promised to get me a new one. Well, last month, while having a check for over $4,000, he buys a brand new Xbox and games...pawning the Xbox I bought him for our anniversary 2 years prior. I finally asked, and he said he had no money for a ring. (I had a $200 Wal-Mart ring picked out..). Then, this weekend, I wake up and he has missed messages on his phone. I checked them, because our son was with his aunt. (Ok, and sometimes it's another woman). I just checked to see WHO they were from...and it was another woman..so I read it. It said "Hey" then another "Hey. What are you doing? I'm just sitting here alone in my bedroom, bored....I knew he said he met her in class, I checked, not in class. That is what he told me when I asked, then he admitted that he met her after class while "hanging out" and asked her for her number for "unknown reasons" just came out before he knew it. He had just answered her texts to "be polite" and erased them so I wouldn't be mad. (He was texting her while I was in class). Unfortunately, this is about the 5th woman. I have a list of names. I've found dating websites, messages on myspace/facebook, etc. He told me he needed a "break" and that after his break we could get back together. Ok, so, what does this even mean? Obviously, this guy has no intention of marrying me right? No ring, no proposal, no anniversary plans/gifts (I usually get a mutually liked dvd for special occasions) and a new girls number. I love him though, and I try to think maybe I am too overbearing? Maybe it is because I did not lose the weight he wanted me to? Should I just give up on this now? Yeah, I wasn't mad about the Xbox. Just that he pawned the one I gave him, and had enough money for both items! What he pawned it for could have at least gone toward the ring. Also, he put me into the mind of marriage, as he brought it up, then poof! It was gone. So it makes me think. Also, I bought all of the boy's winter clothes, new toys, etc, so it wasn't that he didn't have money because he spent so much on our son. I should graduate in May with bachelors and associate degrees. He just started school. I think I am also seeing the pattern! lol
Marriage & Divorce - 13 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
yes. you should give up on this now. You have a little boy on your hands who is impulsive to buy boy games as well as looking elsewhere while leaving you hanging. And yes, the ring is important. Don't ever say it isn't again. You know what guys do with that information now don't you? It tells them you're not that important, that you cheap and that you'll wait and wait and wait......Stop waiting. Raise your standards. And never apologize for it.
2 :
You've been with he guy 3 yrs, he's stepping out on you, he spends money on toys when that's probably not the best way spend it if he's got a partner and a child to help support...he doesn't sound ready for marriage or responsible enough, so why are you still wasting time with him??? You can't force someone to be ready to marry and the kid was bad timing indeed but you can't send it back...he can pay you support and not be married to you, and from what you describe he's not someone you'd be happy married to anyway...set him free to sow his oats...
3 :
I don't know why you are waiting for him. If you want to be married, say so.Put a time frame on it and let him know what you expect. You are a grown woman who is a mother. It's time to direct your own life rather than wait on him. Don't have any more babies with boyfriends. Marriage is a goal of yours. Put your priorities straight.
4 :
Babies are expensive. Maybe he can't afford one after buying diapers, baby wipes, formula plus feeding a family. I wandered in the baby section to get some diapers for a friend's daughter and other baby things and was shocked at the prices since my son was a baby! Thank God that was 27 years ago since I had to get diapers for him!
5 :
Honey, an engagement ring should cost a guy roughly 3 month's pay. So, yeah, IT IS important. I would say that the most important thing to your guy is HIM, not you, not your baby, but HIM. This will not likely change - EVER. You have some tough decisions to make, choose wisely.
6 :
Honey I am sorry, but if marriage is what you want this isn't your guy. Trust me if it was his priority, he would have spent the cash on a ring for you - and not all the toys. This is a take it or leave it situation. Take a look at your life with him, and see if you are willing to accept it as-is. With no other expectations, hopes, etc. If you love him enough to stay then stay without expecting anything. After two years of being together unmarried, couples that marry after two years have a significant jump in divorce rates. Basically because of the expectations brought on by marriage and what roles the man and woman play. So if its something you want, embrace it. If not then start moving towards getting on with your life without him. You know he is up to no good. Let's hope he isn't sleeping around for your health's sake. You sound very smart and I am sure can figure this one out.
7 :
He has an established history of cheating (or at least trying), he blows the family budget on toys for himself, and yet you think this is somehow justified because you haven't lost all of the weight you put on bearing his kid? Honey, please listen to yourself. Then call his bluff and take the "break," but tell him you'll be the one letting him know whether you want to put up with his nonsense any longer. I can almost guarantee you he'll panic. Just don't take him back unless you see sincere evidence of long-term change.
8 :
I would of said no if it was just the Xbox and stuff because thats most men. But the other women is just too much, drop that boiii and live your life because you deserve to find your own beautiful husband that understands you :) good luck
9 :
i know you love him...but please let go of him...please...he is disrespecting you in a major way and you will be disrespecting yourself if you go along with his B.S....just look how many women have answered and said let go
10 :
Absolutely he has NO intentions.. you are his comfort zone. Hey, no ring... no marriage... no commitment. You and your child deserve better. You need a committed man who loves you and want to spend the rest of his life with you (and you alone) and your child needs a father who not only loves him but is committed to his mother. Be praying for you.
11 :
A lot of good advice here. This is a tale as old as time. What you have here is a selfish man. Your love will not change him. You are not responsible for what he does; it's not the weight you didn't lose, it's the man himself. He is cheating on you. He doesn't care to marry you because he feels that he is still single and also that you can be bought off with cheap trinkets and lies. Before that baby is old enough to truly remember him, replace that selfish man with a good man. Three quarters of the men out there are good and loving husbands and fathers; get you one of those. Then your precious child will grow up loving a man who is worth it. Women have met this sort of man for thousands and thousands of years. You are not the only one who has suffered like this. Find the man who loves you for you, who eagerly asks for your hand in marriage, and who feels lucky if you say "yes."
12 :
"Obviously, this guy has no intention of marrying me right?" Right. "Should I just give up on this now?" Yes.
13 :
He has no intentions of ever marrying you, and you should consider yourself lucky. Why in the name of all that is sane would you want to spend your life with someone who is immature, irresponsible, dishonest AND cheats on you into the bargain? Stop wasting your time already.
Read more other entries :
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