Why is my spouse acting like this?
Forgive my if this is a little long, but our situations have always been complex. In the beginning of February, my boyfriend and I of two years broke up. We are still very much in love with each other so we would talk every now and then and it would drive me insane. He says he loves me, but we just aren't right together, so in the beginning it was obviously killing him as I pleaded for him to take me back. It didn't push him away, it just made him more sad. I learned that begging and pleading was the wrong approach to take, so I started treating him like a friend instead. The way I talk to my male friends would be like, "Yeah, bro;" or "Sup, man?" I'm a female but I'm cool with a lot of guys because I have the tendency to think like a guy, but I still retain my feminine attributes. I started talking with him like that and he didn't like it, so it obviously drove him insane. I was going really crazy and decided to type to him how much I loved him on Facebook.. Wrong move, I know; because he didn't respond back and I told him it hurt my feelings and then he replied with, "Well we aren't dating anyway so it's not really in my place." I got upset and told him, "Well, you and I are still showing the signs that we love eachother so if you want to be with me in the future and start fresh then you still have to show me that you care, otherwise I'll start losing affection for you." This is where his little attitude that pisses me off starting evolving. He acts like he doesn't care, and that I'm the source of all of his drama. He works on a boat, 28 days on, 14 off. He came back on March first and once he saw me, he couldn't resist me.. I tried avoiding his kisses for so long before I gave in because he was being so very sweet. Held me from behind, sighed, told me he loved me, etc.. We got along like nothing ever happened. I was very confused and frustrated that I tried to have a serious talk with him a day or two after he came back. This is another main problem: He doesn't take me seriously. I tried to sit and discuss things in a civil manner and while I cried he started giggling. I got really offended. He apologized a billion times and said that he couldn't help it. He jokes around too much for his own good, and it pisses me off highly. During his fourteen days, he was intending on going to Florida for a week to see his dad and relax.. He hasn't had a home for a year now, and would stay with me whenever he came off the boat. All of his material possessions are in Florida, and he says when he's there, he feels like he actually belongs somewhere since all of his identity is there. I understood but it still sucked that he had to leave. I saw him off with a hug and a kiss and he said he'd miss me and he loves me. He called me when he was on his way, and we were having a good conversation. I started getting frustrated the next few days based on his behavior. When I would want to talk to him, he barely gave me the time of day. I asked him, (forgive the language), to "Put down the fucking controller for once, and speak to me." When I did speak with him, all he could talk about was the amount of money he spent on his room and the things he bought, etc.. When he's off the boat, he's a massive pothead, so I think the pot was affecting his behavior too. Anytime I wanted to be serious I'd say, "Serious talk time." He would get immensely frustrated, sigh, and act like I was a huge problem. This is basically our conversations for the past few days. Him: "Would you just chill out? All you are is negativity and we never have a pleasant conversation." Me: (in tears each time because he just won't listen to me) "There wouldn't BE a problem if you would put forth the effort right now to work on what's ailing me." I believe it's because of pot, he's acting carefree. All I get is anger, annoyance, or silence. It's getting to where I just don't like him as a person anymore. He says he still wants to be with me, and he'll work on himself, but it won't come quick, and I'm impatient. He calls "flirting" with me, flicking water on me.. It's fucking annoying, and not cute. I told him I'm done with the drama.. And I'm intending on giving up, especially when he said he's gonna stay in Florida longer than he intended when he leaves on March 15.. More time for video games, less time for me and trying to solve each others problems. He emotionally neglects and abuses me and is in denial and puts me off as "drama." While taking to him last night, he was really high and said, "I'll stay over there by you for two or three days.." When coming off the boat, mind you.. I can't take him anymore.. He's acting like a piece of shit and he never used to be this way. I think his money is changing him. I
Singles & Dating - 1 Answers
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First of all, unless you're married, he's not your spouse. It also sounds like you two are just not compatible. You want different things in a relationship, and in a person. Break it off now before you implode. Luck!
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