im getting too obsessed with my friend?
My friend angie and I started out normal, I looked at her the same as any other friend. She kind of had her group though, and I had mine and I didn't care if she didnt invite me to somethig. But we started spending more time together and then got really close. I just love talking with her-- it's so much fun! We kind of have similar personalities and she's really smart and idk the conversations are the best then I've ever had with another person. I dont have any classes with her so I totally take advantage of the time I do see her. I have to admit, we kind of go off in our own world when we're in a big group and see each other but I didnt really think anyone cared. We're not really "best friends" because she already has one (we havent discussed this though) but shes my FAVORITE friend. However, as we grew closer and closer I'm afraid I'm more annoying. I feel like she's taken over my life. Everything I do, I kind of do with her in mind. She doesnt like ruffles or animal prints -- so I gravitate toward neon colored clothes like she likes. She abhors its always sunny in philadelphia, so even though i secretly like that show, I pretend I dont. I'm always paranoid thats shes going to hang out with other people without me and ill be crushed. i think shes kind of getting tired of me. I really want to keep our friendship amazing like it was but im afraid im getting too clingy. i dont know how to stop, though!!! every facebook status I want to post would be something she likes, because ive trained myself to virtually like all the bands she does (i mean i truly like them but mostly because of her), looking around my room-- a guns n roses poster, a glee poster, beatles blanket, picture of the hot math teacher we both have a crush on (hahaha i know, creepy right??) all are stuff she likes too. i dont know how to get my life back!!! i want to be her best friend but we arent the type to talk about feelings and stuff, you know? she finds that gross. im a girl.. shes a girl...im straight
Friends - 5 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
i think you got a " crush" on her.. but im gna be honest... i have this guy friend whos somtimes annoying but i lov him and he ha a crush on me and hes stalkerish obbsessed.. and that made our friendship weird...
2 :
This is very unattractive of you.
3 :
I think you should give her some space. You two should hang out, but be your own person as well. Your friendship will be much stronger for it. Clingy people get annoying fast.
4 :
Sounds like you like your friend so much that you want to be cool like her, even if it means giving up a few things about yourself. While it's only natural for you to become similar to those who you associate with, it shouldn't mean you become a different person. You probably never met anybody like her and want to be friends with her for a long time. But that still doesn't allow you to lock her up in a cage just for you. Allow her to have other friends too. She isn't going to wake up tomorrow morning with no memory of who you are or something. To get the friendship back to normal it first starts with you. Be who you are. If she is a real friend then she will like you for who you really are. That means take down the posters of stuff she likes in your room because it's YOUR room about YOU, not her. Post what you want to, not what she would like. Wear what you like. Listen to music you like. Then you can focus on the friendship! :) However if you can't talk to her very easily about stuff on your mind then what do you talk about? if she finds it "gross" that you want to tell her, "hey lately i've been feeling ____" or something then that's a wedge in communication and will result in a failed friendship. communication is key in any kind of relationship. good luck
5 :
First, I think you need to be a little honest with yourself, and with this friend of yours, Angie, at least with some of the stuff that you do like, like the weird comedy show, "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." You don't have to pretend you don't like it when you actually do. I don't think it would matter to her if you like certain things that she doesn't like, since it seems like you have a lot of similarities as it is. Everyone is different so its expected that we have our preferences in certain interests. You don't have to conform to everything that she particularly likes just to get her to be closer friends with you, or to make her pay more attention to you. If you two are already friends as it is, then that should be enough. In regards to this Angie hanging out with other people, don't over-react if she doesn't invite you to every gathering or hang out, because she probably has other friends she wants to get see and hang out with too. If she brings a friend along, like you, to another friend's event then it can come off as her being a bit inconsiderate and rude, since it's not her event to invite others to come out. You can't expect to know every single one of her friends. But also, don't bring up these thoughts or feelings, making her aware of the situation because you'll then be seen as needy or high maintenance, and that would just make things awkward for her. I do agree that you are becoming a bit clingy though (no disrespect), but try to relax and not think about it too much. If you do, this is the cause of your paranoia, which is making you feel uncomfortable. If you expect her to bring you to every occasion she's been invited, that just doesn't sound realistic. Just be yourself. Friendship depends on the people you choose to trust and rely on. Just because she already has a best friend doesn't mean that she doesn't consider you as a close friend. It seems like you two are already close friends from the sound of it since she's opened up a lot for you to know what she likes and dislikes. Just don't think too much into it and you'll be fine. If you keep asking to hang out and be everywhere with her, she'll start to feel suffocated and you'll just push her away, so keep your distance and give her some space. Remember, you two are already friends so don't do anything that would change it.
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