Strange family situation, involving adoption and new family members!?
My biological parents had drug problems, so bad that I was adopted by my paternal grandfather when I was 4. I never knew that my "dad" was my "grandfather" until I was about 12, because my "mom" freaked out and never let my other family members near me or know anything about me. After "dad" and "mom" were divorced when I was 13, I was able to meet my biological father, my half brother, my uncles, and my grandma on his side of the family. When I was 15, I met a ton of people on my mom's side: grandma, 2 half sisters, 3 aunts, 1 uncle and a bazillion cousins. My mom died when I was 7, which of course I knew nothing about. It turns out that my mom had been "at the wrong place at the wrong time" and was beaten and shot to death. There were a lot of strange circumstances with her death which leads my family to believe that it was an inside job, since there was a huge lack of police involvement and paperwork. At first they tried to pass it off as a suicide, but with the angle that the bullet entered her body it would've been impossible for her to kill herself. She had 3 autopsies done. It seems as if everyone has a different view on what happened with my adoption and mom's death. Some people know more than others, and some know details that are much different than the other stories I've heard. My biological dad has agreed to go with me to the court house.. my adoption documents have been sealed, and apparently I'm the only one that can access them. AND... today I got a friend request on facebook from one of my mom's cousins on her dad's side. I haven't met anyone from that side of her family yet and I talked to her online. She seems very nice and told me a few stories about my mom when she was younger. Questions: One of my sisters and I were talking about having our mom's case put on Cold Case Files or some other forensic show in case anyone has any information about her death. How can we do this, and how do we discuss it with other members of our family without upsetting them? How, other than reading my adoption information, can I figure out what really happened with my adoption? Any advice is appreciated.
Family - 1 Answers
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do what you think is right :-)
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Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Boyfriend vs. new guy friend/old crush?!?
Boyfriend vs. new guy friend/old crush?!?
I have a loving boyfriend of 5 years. last fall, we had a rocky time in our relationship because i started liking a guy from my school and i felt horribly guilty about it and ended up confessing it to my boyfriend. since then, he has had slight trust issues and made me delete that guy friend from my facebook and made me promise that i didn't like him anymore and wouldn't talk to him. so i had a really hard time because i still liked the other guy (even though i hardly knew him). i talked to him a few times last fall, but then i stopped and we didn't see each other for months. last week, the guy friend, after not talking to me/seeing me for months, came up to my boyfriend and i at an awards ceremony in which i won an award and this guy congratulated me! since last week, i haven't been able to stop thinking of him. i was completely obsessed with this guy, so i emailed him a few times, without my boyfriend knowing and today, i met up with this guy for coffee to discuss forming an extracurricular group together this fall at our school. now that i've gotten a chance to talk to him more, i don't feel like i have much of a crush on this guy anymore, but i still really want to be friends with him. however, i know my boyfriend would never understand because of how i felt about this other guy last year. i feel like i'd be missing out on a lot of experiences if i didn't become friends with this other guy, but i don't know what to do about my boyfriend. i love him, but i just wish he never knew about this other guy so i could openly be friends with him and not hide things from my boyfriend. i also feel like i want more independence and not to have to tell my boyfriend everything, to be able to be friends and hang out with anyone i want to. i need something to change soon. what should i do?
Friends - 1 Answers
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1 :
you have to figure this out one your own but im sure you'll make the right desition
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I have a loving boyfriend of 5 years. last fall, we had a rocky time in our relationship because i started liking a guy from my school and i felt horribly guilty about it and ended up confessing it to my boyfriend. since then, he has had slight trust issues and made me delete that guy friend from my facebook and made me promise that i didn't like him anymore and wouldn't talk to him. so i had a really hard time because i still liked the other guy (even though i hardly knew him). i talked to him a few times last fall, but then i stopped and we didn't see each other for months. last week, the guy friend, after not talking to me/seeing me for months, came up to my boyfriend and i at an awards ceremony in which i won an award and this guy congratulated me! since last week, i haven't been able to stop thinking of him. i was completely obsessed with this guy, so i emailed him a few times, without my boyfriend knowing and today, i met up with this guy for coffee to discuss forming an extracurricular group together this fall at our school. now that i've gotten a chance to talk to him more, i don't feel like i have much of a crush on this guy anymore, but i still really want to be friends with him. however, i know my boyfriend would never understand because of how i felt about this other guy last year. i feel like i'd be missing out on a lot of experiences if i didn't become friends with this other guy, but i don't know what to do about my boyfriend. i love him, but i just wish he never knew about this other guy so i could openly be friends with him and not hide things from my boyfriend. i also feel like i want more independence and not to have to tell my boyfriend everything, to be able to be friends and hang out with anyone i want to. i need something to change soon. what should i do?
Friends - 1 Answers
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1 :
you have to figure this out one your own but im sure you'll make the right desition
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Wednesday, August 7, 2013
How can a person on facebook have their wall blocked to a specific person, yet some of the posts they make..?
How can a person on facebook have their wall blocked to a specific person, yet some of the posts they make..?
..still show up on that person's live feed? A little more clarification: I have an ex, who blocked her wall from me about 2 months ago, presumable because she has a new boyfriend and didn't want me to get my feelings hurt by seeing her discuss him. Totally fine. That being said, when she would comment on photos, or add friends, these would pop up in my feed from time to time, despite her wall being blocked. Again, no big deal. Then starting yesterday, I noticed that something she posted on her wall popped up in my feed, yet her wall is still blocked. And it happened again today. Wall is still blocked though. On a personal level,I don't really care that much, but I find it strange that this is happening. (And, it isn't just on my PC; these show up on my smartphone FB app as well.) Is it possible that this is some kind of extended glitch in the facebook system, or is there some way of selectively allowing wall posts to go through, perhaps "unblocking me" just to let one or two posts to go through, then re-instating the block? It doesn't bother me either way, but I haven't seen any precedent for it in any of the forums that I have looked through. Anyone who is a more prolific facebook-er care to comment?
Facebook - 1 Answers
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The only thing I can think of is that she just chose to block her wall, NOT her activity. This means you can see her comments, especially if they are to mutual friends. Good luck!
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..still show up on that person's live feed? A little more clarification: I have an ex, who blocked her wall from me about 2 months ago, presumable because she has a new boyfriend and didn't want me to get my feelings hurt by seeing her discuss him. Totally fine. That being said, when she would comment on photos, or add friends, these would pop up in my feed from time to time, despite her wall being blocked. Again, no big deal. Then starting yesterday, I noticed that something she posted on her wall popped up in my feed, yet her wall is still blocked. And it happened again today. Wall is still blocked though. On a personal level,I don't really care that much, but I find it strange that this is happening. (And, it isn't just on my PC; these show up on my smartphone FB app as well.) Is it possible that this is some kind of extended glitch in the facebook system, or is there some way of selectively allowing wall posts to go through, perhaps "unblocking me" just to let one or two posts to go through, then re-instating the block? It doesn't bother me either way, but I haven't seen any precedent for it in any of the forums that I have looked through. Anyone who is a more prolific facebook-er care to comment?
Facebook - 1 Answers
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1 :
The only thing I can think of is that she just chose to block her wall, NOT her activity. This means you can see her comments, especially if they are to mutual friends. Good luck!
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Thursday, August 1, 2013
Boyfriend and Facebook?
Boyfriend and Facebook?
Okay, so I haven't been with my new boyfriend for that long, but when we got together we agreed to change our relationship statuses on facebook to 'In a relationship with ___' Today I went on facebook and noticed that mine only says 'In a relationship' his name is now removed, I went to his profile and his relationship status is completely hidden. And his most recent status update is 'Until we meet again....' I don't know why he would change it so suddenly, we're talking fine, he's still calling me hun and baby and he's even invited me to go away with him for a few days next week. So I don't understand it. This wouldn't be bothering me so much if I thought it was just a privacy issue but all his friends and family already know about me. And before we started dating his status was never 'single' it was always just hidden. Any idea what this could mean? It's really driving me crazy. I do plan on talking to him about it when I see him (I don't want to discuss something like this over the phone or in a text) but I'm just looking for another person's opinion. Thank you. I think another reason why this is bothering me so much is because my last boyfriend said he wanted a 'break' and made me believe that was all it was but he was actually out playing the field. And then he decided to officially breakup with me by changing his relationship status on facebook, no call or anything to tell me he wanted it to be over he just changed his status. So I guess I'm worried that my new boyfriend is now doing the same thing....
Singles & Dating - 2 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I think maybe he's shy showing to other people on facebook that you guys are on relationship. ( Even though you guys agreed to put it on Facebook) When you guys meet just ask him why he didn't put it on Facebook or why he removed it. Good luck! Hope it helps.
2 :
I think it would be best to talk to him about it in person if this is really bothering you. Part of having a strong relationship is being able to tell your partner what's on your mind. If he dodges the question in any way, he may be hiding something. Just have a private conversation with him and hopefully he will give you a reason for his behavior. Good luck!
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Okay, so I haven't been with my new boyfriend for that long, but when we got together we agreed to change our relationship statuses on facebook to 'In a relationship with ___' Today I went on facebook and noticed that mine only says 'In a relationship' his name is now removed, I went to his profile and his relationship status is completely hidden. And his most recent status update is 'Until we meet again....' I don't know why he would change it so suddenly, we're talking fine, he's still calling me hun and baby and he's even invited me to go away with him for a few days next week. So I don't understand it. This wouldn't be bothering me so much if I thought it was just a privacy issue but all his friends and family already know about me. And before we started dating his status was never 'single' it was always just hidden. Any idea what this could mean? It's really driving me crazy. I do plan on talking to him about it when I see him (I don't want to discuss something like this over the phone or in a text) but I'm just looking for another person's opinion. Thank you. I think another reason why this is bothering me so much is because my last boyfriend said he wanted a 'break' and made me believe that was all it was but he was actually out playing the field. And then he decided to officially breakup with me by changing his relationship status on facebook, no call or anything to tell me he wanted it to be over he just changed his status. So I guess I'm worried that my new boyfriend is now doing the same thing....
Singles & Dating - 2 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I think maybe he's shy showing to other people on facebook that you guys are on relationship. ( Even though you guys agreed to put it on Facebook) When you guys meet just ask him why he didn't put it on Facebook or why he removed it. Good luck! Hope it helps.
2 :
I think it would be best to talk to him about it in person if this is really bothering you. Part of having a strong relationship is being able to tell your partner what's on your mind. If he dodges the question in any way, he may be hiding something. Just have a private conversation with him and hopefully he will give you a reason for his behavior. Good luck!
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