How do I discipline my 15 year old sister over the summer?
I myself am 24, and am contemplating having my 15 year old sister spend the summer with my family. She lives in Texas, and we are in Nebraska. She is a great student, she takes honors classes and play the clarinet in the marching band. Totally differnt at home though. Shes been quite unruly the past year and a half. Mainly boy troubles, and disrespecting/being rude my mom. It started with texting cleavage pictures to boys--which led to having her cell taken away, then instant messaging sexual messages on Facebook-- so she has lost her computer privleges at home, she carried on a relationship with a boy three years older than her in a program similar to JROTC, even after being told to stop. Most recently, my mom found out she and this boy had had sex. I wont go into all the details, but I have no problem answering questions about her situation. I want her to come to my house for the summer, not to escape her problems/punishment, but to let her see that she can still be 15. That even though she did let mom down, its not the end of the world. She can still be happy. I want her to go to church, and get involved with a youth group. I'd like her to have a summer job, and take on more responsibilities at home. I want her to learn to communicate, that even when you ahve made a mistake, you can talk about it. She could also play in one of the city's summer sports leagues. I'm stumped for discipline ideas though. She's 15, shes not perfect. I know she will disobey me. There will be a day she comes home late, or doesnt tell me shes going somewhere, or won't clean her room, etc. Just seems whatever discipline my mother uses does not get through. I want her to understand the things she has done are wrong, and that there will be a punishment for it. I just don;t know what. I do plan to discuss discipline/punishment with our mom, I just think we need new ideas! I'd like ot have her know what her punishments will be for certain behaviors... so that I am more enforcing rules and discipline from our mom, than trying to be her boss. I want to try to keep the sister role in this, not take over the mom role. Thanks!
Adolescent - 4 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
my moms Friend has a 20 yr, 16 yr, 10 yr, and a 4 yr and she took in her 14 yr niece on the count of the 14yr old's mom lost her home so they split up the kids anyways...the 14 yr old is the same way yet her aunt just wants to condemn her and not discipline her so if it were i ((in both your situations)) i would make her go to church sun morning and night sundays school and everything and youth group on Wednesday night because if shes around good christian kids shes gonna act better to try to fit in
2 :
Really you can't stop her. The more you try to stop her, the more cool stories she'll have to share to all the boys. She's reaching that age - and all you can do is remind her to continue with her regular routines and maybe share a few stories of your sexual life. A small warning about a few guys will go a long way. Other then that you must give her her space and trust her. She'll be peer pressures into sharing pictures and such; but that's how most girls that age are. You need to remind her of her woman power; and place your trust in her. Maybe continue reminding her you trust her so she will feel guilty in the acts. Sadly if you push to hard to get in the way; you'll make the situations worse.
3 :
Hey!! I'm in Nebraska!! Anyways! I think it's great you want to do this, being a big sister myself, I know what it's like to want to guide the little one. I say you take her out for her favorite food or ice cream and have a talk. Tell her that yeah, what she was doing was bad but you don't think she's a horrible person. Tell her that no matter what everyone is going to love her just the same. Also, give her a self esteem boost. The reason she's sending those pics is because she feels like the only way she will get a guy is by showing off. Same with sex. Take her to get her hair done and teach her how to be a lady. Tell her that playing hard to get is just as effective. I like the job idea. I got a job at 15 and I matured fast. It was great to be able to do what I wanted with my money. I'm sure she wants a car when she turns 16, so this is a great way to save up. Youth group and church are good too. This way she can make friends while she'd down there. As for punishment get her a tracfone. The prepaid phone will help with responsibility! When she gets her job she will be paying for it so I doubt she'll want to use it that much. And make sure you check the phone too. She did something bad and still deserves a punishment, so her privacy rights have been taken away. I would block facebook, myspace, skype, AIM, all of that kind of stuff on your computer. And make sure you are checking the history. Maybe put her in etiquette classes to teach her manners and how to respect her mom and herself. Remember, tell her you love her and that if she works hard at becoming a better person, life at home will become a lot easier. :)
4 :
Punishment isn't going to work anymore. She is fast becoming an adult .. she knows it. What you need to do it talk to her as an equal. She needs to realize that she should stop these things for herself not to avoid punishment. Here's an example ... When I was a teen there were many people offering me drugs. I thought (and still do) people that did drugs were stupid and wanted nothing to do with them. Had I wanted the drugs no amount of punishment would have stopped me from taking them. In your sister's case she has to avoid sex because she wants to. As for punishments... Cleaning her room? Try mocking her filth ... embarrassment is a very big motivator .. so if she doesn't clean it tell her you will post pictures of her room on facebook. When she is late or doesn't tell you where she went.... time to practice your acting skills. Make a big fuss when she comes home. "OMG! I thought you were dead or someone kidnapped you!" Crying as much as you can. Guilt .. also good motivation. Make her swear that she will never ever do that again. As for sex... hmmm... that one is going to be the hardest to manage. As I said no punishment will stop this. Playing devil's advocate you could approach the matter by telling her personal stories (make one up if you have to) about how you had problems because you had sex with someone.
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Monday, February 28, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Why is neither the left or right reporting this news about the WH crashers and Obama connection?
Why is neither the left or right reporting this news about the WH crashers and Obama connection?
I'm puzzled and I would just like some opinions and what is the angle - I can't figure it out! Why the secret service is investigating itself, the white house is investigating and the couple are not discussing that the husband and Obama worked at the Univ of Chicago together and he worked on Obama's campaign - they know eachother and they act like they've never met! There is no way to link so I'll paste, but here's the original stories: http://canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/17310 http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=117478 And cut and paste for the rest of you: "Unprecedented†first state dinner in a tent “Party Crashers†had five-year relationship with Obama before state dinner Judi McLeod Bio Print friendly E-mail a friend Contact Us By Judi McLeod Saturday, November 28, 2009 While the big gun media and American Secret Service are out there investigating “party crashers†Tareq and Michaele Salahi, no one’s telling the truth: Obama knew the Salahis when he was still an Illinois senator. Polo Contacts Worldwide could make it easy for the investigating Secret Service by brown-enveloping them this picture: Hey Secret Agent Man, here’s Obama, the senator flashing his pearly whites with Randy Jackson, better known as a judge on American Idol. “Others pictured are Black Eyed Peas Rock Band; Tareq Salahi the President of the America’s Polo Cup; President Elect Obama, Fergie from Black eyed Peas and Michaele Salahi, posing this time as a former Miss USA and SuperModel.†Interesting little detail for White House gumshoes: As the above photo was published in June 2005, Barack Obama was still Senator Obama and not the President Elect. And with Michaele Salahi yesterday having been caught out—Facebook pompoms notwithstanding—as a bogus cheerleader for the Washington Red Skins and not a model for Victoria’s Secret as claimed, Canada Free Press (CFP) leaves it to FoxNews.com to find out if she ever was a “former Miss USAâ€. We do know for a fact that among the slew of memberships on charitable boards, Tareq Salahi is a former member of The American Task Force on Palestine (ATFP). The only way to know for a fact is because even though ATFP scrubbed all references to Salahi as a board member, he can still be found on Google cache. (Canada Free Press) Sad that White House Secret Service are looking like Keystone Kops in the aftermath of Obama’s very first state house dinner in the tent. While the media is fixated on the hitch in Michaele Salahi’s git-along, there can be no doubt that these recently minted “party crashers†really get around. We take you back to June 9, 2005 when Tom Nelson, operating officer of AARP, was summing up the Rock the Vote Awards night. According to the Washington Post “everyone from Sens. John McCain and Barack Obama to “American Idol†judge Randy Jackson and R&B singer Mya gathered in the National Building Museum’s Great Hall: “You were probably wondering, as you sat down at your table, ‘What the heck is the AARP doing in a Rock the Vote Event?’†Nelson noted. Time would soon tell that the AARP would show up in other fishy places. And if there is anyone who must know that this weekend’s party crasher story is a crock it’s John McCain who was at the Vote Awards Night, and who along with Barack Obama, was honored with the Rock the Nation Award, Obama “for forming a multiracial coalition in winning his seatâ€. McCain was handed his award for “his work on campaign finance reformâ€. “Just call me Funk Master McCain,†he told the audience of 1,000 in accepting his award.: (washingtonpost.com, June 9, 2005. Meanwhile, don’t know why Obama’s long time associates possibly could be mistaken for party crashers when they came into the tent with a Bravo Reality TV Show “Real Housewives of DC†professional camera crew and makeup artist in tow unless he was hoping for a Reality gig for wife Michelle, CBS celebrity Katie Couric or Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel. Obama could end the “party crasher†goose chase for White House Secret Service in a proverbial New York Minute by coming clean on his almost 5-year-old social/political relationship with Tareq and Michaele Salahi. It could save money in these recessionary times and put an end to the drama of Washington’s “unprecedented†first state dinner in a tent WorldNetDaily Exclusive White House 'gatecrashers' tied to terror sympathizer Salahi served in same anti-Israel group as Obama's Palestinian professor pal -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Posted: November 29, 2009 5:12 pm Eastern By Aaron Klein © 2009 WorldNetDaily Rashid Khalidi The Virginia couple who allegedly crashed a White House state dinner is tied to Rashid Khalidi, a pro-Palestinian professor who excuses terrorism and has been a close associate to President Obama. Michaele and Tareq Salahi met Obama in To THINK, I'm truly not slamming anyone, since I don't believe the government of either side! Just confused wondering why.
Politics - 5 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Do tell. Somehow, I knew it was Obama's fault.
2 :
They don't want to let people know that Hussein is hanging around muslim terrorists. They were busy talking about Tiger Woods' fire hydrant. Fox News is far from conservative, it's exactly the same as CNN and other liberal news outlets.
3 :
If that is true, then why didn't Obama just come right out and say so? He is such a wishy washy person and does not like to be clear and precise about anything. And libs on answers support him? the Loons following the Loon I guess.
4 :
Headline News reported they were 0bama's coke connection.
5 :
Well if the guy DID know the President from before and said that then it probably helped him get in. But who really cares? What are they supposed to pay the taxpayer back for the shrimp cocktails they ate?
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I'm puzzled and I would just like some opinions and what is the angle - I can't figure it out! Why the secret service is investigating itself, the white house is investigating and the couple are not discussing that the husband and Obama worked at the Univ of Chicago together and he worked on Obama's campaign - they know eachother and they act like they've never met! There is no way to link so I'll paste, but here's the original stories: http://canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/17310 http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=117478 And cut and paste for the rest of you: "Unprecedented†first state dinner in a tent “Party Crashers†had five-year relationship with Obama before state dinner Judi McLeod Bio Print friendly E-mail a friend Contact Us By Judi McLeod Saturday, November 28, 2009 While the big gun media and American Secret Service are out there investigating “party crashers†Tareq and Michaele Salahi, no one’s telling the truth: Obama knew the Salahis when he was still an Illinois senator. Polo Contacts Worldwide could make it easy for the investigating Secret Service by brown-enveloping them this picture: Hey Secret Agent Man, here’s Obama, the senator flashing his pearly whites with Randy Jackson, better known as a judge on American Idol. “Others pictured are Black Eyed Peas Rock Band; Tareq Salahi the President of the America’s Polo Cup; President Elect Obama, Fergie from Black eyed Peas and Michaele Salahi, posing this time as a former Miss USA and SuperModel.†Interesting little detail for White House gumshoes: As the above photo was published in June 2005, Barack Obama was still Senator Obama and not the President Elect. And with Michaele Salahi yesterday having been caught out—Facebook pompoms notwithstanding—as a bogus cheerleader for the Washington Red Skins and not a model for Victoria’s Secret as claimed, Canada Free Press (CFP) leaves it to FoxNews.com to find out if she ever was a “former Miss USAâ€. We do know for a fact that among the slew of memberships on charitable boards, Tareq Salahi is a former member of The American Task Force on Palestine (ATFP). The only way to know for a fact is because even though ATFP scrubbed all references to Salahi as a board member, he can still be found on Google cache. (Canada Free Press) Sad that White House Secret Service are looking like Keystone Kops in the aftermath of Obama’s very first state house dinner in the tent. While the media is fixated on the hitch in Michaele Salahi’s git-along, there can be no doubt that these recently minted “party crashers†really get around. We take you back to June 9, 2005 when Tom Nelson, operating officer of AARP, was summing up the Rock the Vote Awards night. According to the Washington Post “everyone from Sens. John McCain and Barack Obama to “American Idol†judge Randy Jackson and R&B singer Mya gathered in the National Building Museum’s Great Hall: “You were probably wondering, as you sat down at your table, ‘What the heck is the AARP doing in a Rock the Vote Event?’†Nelson noted. Time would soon tell that the AARP would show up in other fishy places. And if there is anyone who must know that this weekend’s party crasher story is a crock it’s John McCain who was at the Vote Awards Night, and who along with Barack Obama, was honored with the Rock the Nation Award, Obama “for forming a multiracial coalition in winning his seatâ€. McCain was handed his award for “his work on campaign finance reformâ€. “Just call me Funk Master McCain,†he told the audience of 1,000 in accepting his award.: (washingtonpost.com, June 9, 2005. Meanwhile, don’t know why Obama’s long time associates possibly could be mistaken for party crashers when they came into the tent with a Bravo Reality TV Show “Real Housewives of DC†professional camera crew and makeup artist in tow unless he was hoping for a Reality gig for wife Michelle, CBS celebrity Katie Couric or Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel. Obama could end the “party crasher†goose chase for White House Secret Service in a proverbial New York Minute by coming clean on his almost 5-year-old social/political relationship with Tareq and Michaele Salahi. It could save money in these recessionary times and put an end to the drama of Washington’s “unprecedented†first state dinner in a tent WorldNetDaily Exclusive White House 'gatecrashers' tied to terror sympathizer Salahi served in same anti-Israel group as Obama's Palestinian professor pal -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Posted: November 29, 2009 5:12 pm Eastern By Aaron Klein © 2009 WorldNetDaily Rashid Khalidi The Virginia couple who allegedly crashed a White House state dinner is tied to Rashid Khalidi, a pro-Palestinian professor who excuses terrorism and has been a close associate to President Obama. Michaele and Tareq Salahi met Obama in To THINK, I'm truly not slamming anyone, since I don't believe the government of either side! Just confused wondering why.
Politics - 5 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
Do tell. Somehow, I knew it was Obama's fault.
2 :
They don't want to let people know that Hussein is hanging around muslim terrorists. They were busy talking about Tiger Woods' fire hydrant. Fox News is far from conservative, it's exactly the same as CNN and other liberal news outlets.
3 :
If that is true, then why didn't Obama just come right out and say so? He is such a wishy washy person and does not like to be clear and precise about anything. And libs on answers support him? the Loons following the Loon I guess.
4 :
Headline News reported they were 0bama's coke connection.
5 :
Well if the guy DID know the President from before and said that then it probably helped him get in. But who really cares? What are they supposed to pay the taxpayer back for the shrimp cocktails they ate?
Read more other entries :
Monday, February 7, 2011
Does anyone know why he isn't calling?
Does anyone know why he isn't calling?
Super long story, but I'll do my best to brief it up. I currently live and go to school in Chicago, but my family lives in Southern California. I visit often, and will be moving to San Diego in November when I am finished with school. There is a guy in San Diego, that I have known for the past four years. We have a great connection- lots of chemistry, and share many of the same values. We've kept in touch while I've been in Chicago, sometimes we'll chat on the phone for 6-7 hours straight. I saw him during my visit in August, and it was then that he expressed an interest in wanting to be in a relationship. Of course, the feelings were mutual, but at the time, I was in a very serious relationship. He continued to pursue me, but didn't want to get in the way of my relationship. He said he is at the point in his life (he is 27) where he wants to begin settling down, and said that he thinks I am the right woman for him. My boyfriend and I ended things in December, and the guy in SD continued to pursue me, and express his feelings. He always questioned what my plans are after school in Chicago- always wanting to know if I am really coming back or not. A few months ago, he told me that he is afraid that I'll always be the girl who got away. I came home for a visit this past March, and we spent a few days together. We had a great time- he left me notes all over his place, and when he had to leave for work, he would call during his breaks to tell me how much he missed me. The last night I was there, we discussed our situation, and we both shared the same feelings toward one another. I told him I would be back in November for good. Since I've been in Chicago, (about a month now) however, we've barely been speaking. I know this sounds gay, but a couple days after I left, he made his default picture on facebook one of the two of us. I've been really confused, because things seem sort of different now and I don't know why. We've talked a few times since I've been home, but there is certainly a lack of enthusiasm on his end of things. He isn't calling/texting/etc. as much as before, but still has our picture up, which in my opinion, is kind of a relationship thing to do. Not to mention, all of his other default pics are either of him by himself or with his cousins who he is very close to. I am the only girl (non related) that is up there. Anyway, if anyone has any *kind* advice on this matter, I'd appreciate it. I just don't know what's going on, and I don't want to be the needy girl and ask him, "what's wrong?" So this is why I post here. :) Thanks in advance.
Singles & Dating - 1 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I'm in a similar situation and all I can think is that when some guys feel they've "got" you they don't think they need to work as hard any more. Ring him and ask him if you've done something wrong as he's not as chatty as he was. I don't think you have tho- it's just a man thing!
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Super long story, but I'll do my best to brief it up. I currently live and go to school in Chicago, but my family lives in Southern California. I visit often, and will be moving to San Diego in November when I am finished with school. There is a guy in San Diego, that I have known for the past four years. We have a great connection- lots of chemistry, and share many of the same values. We've kept in touch while I've been in Chicago, sometimes we'll chat on the phone for 6-7 hours straight. I saw him during my visit in August, and it was then that he expressed an interest in wanting to be in a relationship. Of course, the feelings were mutual, but at the time, I was in a very serious relationship. He continued to pursue me, but didn't want to get in the way of my relationship. He said he is at the point in his life (he is 27) where he wants to begin settling down, and said that he thinks I am the right woman for him. My boyfriend and I ended things in December, and the guy in SD continued to pursue me, and express his feelings. He always questioned what my plans are after school in Chicago- always wanting to know if I am really coming back or not. A few months ago, he told me that he is afraid that I'll always be the girl who got away. I came home for a visit this past March, and we spent a few days together. We had a great time- he left me notes all over his place, and when he had to leave for work, he would call during his breaks to tell me how much he missed me. The last night I was there, we discussed our situation, and we both shared the same feelings toward one another. I told him I would be back in November for good. Since I've been in Chicago, (about a month now) however, we've barely been speaking. I know this sounds gay, but a couple days after I left, he made his default picture on facebook one of the two of us. I've been really confused, because things seem sort of different now and I don't know why. We've talked a few times since I've been home, but there is certainly a lack of enthusiasm on his end of things. He isn't calling/texting/etc. as much as before, but still has our picture up, which in my opinion, is kind of a relationship thing to do. Not to mention, all of his other default pics are either of him by himself or with his cousins who he is very close to. I am the only girl (non related) that is up there. Anyway, if anyone has any *kind* advice on this matter, I'd appreciate it. I just don't know what's going on, and I don't want to be the needy girl and ask him, "what's wrong?" So this is why I post here. :) Thanks in advance.
Singles & Dating - 1 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I'm in a similar situation and all I can think is that when some guys feel they've "got" you they don't think they need to work as hard any more. Ring him and ask him if you've done something wrong as he's not as chatty as he was. I don't think you have tho- it's just a man thing!
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Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Whats on his mind?!?
Whats on his mind?!?
So I recently got back in contact with a guy I had a thing with last summer. I went to a party at his apartment and hit it off with his best friend and against my best judgement ended up spending the night with him (not doing anything, just kissing) so anyways, his friend ends up finding another girl that he is supposedly in love with and im fine with that, he wasnt a jerk about it or anything. Anyways, I end up going to another party and doing the same thing with the guy I liked before. We had a great night together and discussed a lot of relationshipy things. Anyways, the day after he was talking to me on AIM and everything was cool, but then he stopped talking to me, and untagged pictures of us on facebook. Just wondering what you guys think is on his mind? Also, hes leaving for chicago in a week for the summer so I thought that might be the reason for this, or maybe that his friend told him something bad about me. Do you guys think I should facebook message him to ask whats up? I dont ever really see him unless I mean to run into him, so I would probably have to ask him to meet me in order to see him.
Singles & Dating - 5 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
yeah
2 :
Just simply come out and ask him, face to face.
3 :
yeah definitely ask him whats up. to me it sounds like he's trying to have like one last fling before he leaves. and the whole relationship talk might've made him realize that maybe you're into him a little bit too much? just my opinion but def ask him what's up.
4 :
are u gay? Try agirl!
5 :
think about why you'd untag pictures of someone, if you did... what it means. for me, if i did, it'd mean, im not interested, want you in no way associated with me. first off it's horrible that you hung with both best friend and him, in the same way. and guys talk tooo. and my thought is that he doesn't see you in any other way, then just some girl.... sorry.. hope this helps..leave it alone, if he's interested he will contact you, otherwise, move on and let it go
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So I recently got back in contact with a guy I had a thing with last summer. I went to a party at his apartment and hit it off with his best friend and against my best judgement ended up spending the night with him (not doing anything, just kissing) so anyways, his friend ends up finding another girl that he is supposedly in love with and im fine with that, he wasnt a jerk about it or anything. Anyways, I end up going to another party and doing the same thing with the guy I liked before. We had a great night together and discussed a lot of relationshipy things. Anyways, the day after he was talking to me on AIM and everything was cool, but then he stopped talking to me, and untagged pictures of us on facebook. Just wondering what you guys think is on his mind? Also, hes leaving for chicago in a week for the summer so I thought that might be the reason for this, or maybe that his friend told him something bad about me. Do you guys think I should facebook message him to ask whats up? I dont ever really see him unless I mean to run into him, so I would probably have to ask him to meet me in order to see him.
Singles & Dating - 5 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
yeah
2 :
Just simply come out and ask him, face to face.
3 :
yeah definitely ask him whats up. to me it sounds like he's trying to have like one last fling before he leaves. and the whole relationship talk might've made him realize that maybe you're into him a little bit too much? just my opinion but def ask him what's up.
4 :
are u gay? Try agirl!
5 :
think about why you'd untag pictures of someone, if you did... what it means. for me, if i did, it'd mean, im not interested, want you in no way associated with me. first off it's horrible that you hung with both best friend and him, in the same way. and guys talk tooo. and my thought is that he doesn't see you in any other way, then just some girl.... sorry.. hope this helps..leave it alone, if he's interested he will contact you, otherwise, move on and let it go
Read more other entries :
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